


Friendship and Bravery

by hpandcarbs



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canonical Character Death, First War with Voldemort, Gen, Hogwarts, Marauders, Marauders' Era, Minor Character Death, Underage Drinking, jily
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-07-16 08:23:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 27
Words: 37,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7259971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hpandcarbs/pseuds/hpandcarbs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"We've had precious little to celebrate for eleven years." - Minerva McGonagall, 1981</p><p>This is the story of those who grew up during this time and transitioned from children to soldiers. <br/> Hogwarts 1976 - Halloween 1981</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story is updated every Tuesday, with some extra surprise updates during the week when I have the time. I'm writing from multiple individual perspectives, though I have noticed that I tend to write Lily's the most. The story will also follow any canon information given concerning pairings and deaths, though there will be plenty of original drama as well!

Life is full of moments that shape you. Some are obvious in their importance - weddings, funerals, births. Others are more subtle until later - the first time you open your favorite novel, the last kiss you give your mother. Small moments which serve as a catalyst of everything that is to come. Small moments when you build a relationship with someone that will stand the tests of time. 

On a sunny afternoon in June 1976, Lily Evans lost a friend. Severus Snape declared his side, the side of the blood purists, loud and clear for the world to hear. He called Lily a Mudblood and he lost her trust forever. This insult became one which Severus regretted for the rest of his life. This may seem like an obvious moment. 

On that same afternoon in June 1976, four other boys each experienced a moment which shaped them later in life. After watching them humiliate both Severus Snape and Lily Evans out of boredom, Remus Lupin stood up to his mates and told them exactly how childish they were acting. 

"Don't you ever think before you do something? There's enough of that pureblood dung going around without you two giving anyone reasons to spread it." He walked away, realizing that the people you love are not automatically correct simply by being loved. 

Remus's comment had three consequences, outside of his own understanding. The first consequence is that James Potter went for a fly to clear his head, where he spent the entire time thinking about the things he'd seen in the Prophet or overheard his parents discussing. While trying to clear his head, James began to form the idea that loathing someone does not always mean that you give them reason to loathe you in return. The second consequence is that Sirius Black, watching James and Remus walk off and paying no attention whatsoever to Peter, also chose to walk inside. Remus's words made Sirius think of his family and the last thing Sirius Black wanted was to be anything like his family. His mother would have never deigned to apologize, much less to a muggleborn, so Sirius himself set off to find Lily Evans. With help from the folded parchment in his pocket, he located her in the Owlery, stroking the animals' beaks and crying silently. It was there that Sirius put his arm around Lily and spoke the two words he had previously only said to his three best mates or his professors, and rarely with the sincerity being expressed now: 

"I'm sorry." 

The third consequence of Remus's comment, though seemingly unimportant, was that Peter was left alone under the birch tree. Peter had never been left alone by his friends before. He'd spent time alone, of course, but it had always been voluntary. Never before had Peter felt abandoned. Never before had Peter been left wanting to play a prank with no one to play it with. He did not appreciate the seriousness and frankly, felt that Snape deserved what he got simply by virtue of being Snape. While his comrades began to mature, Peter Pettigrew focused on one thought- that he did not appreciate being ignored.


	2. Chapter 1: Euphemia's Second Son

"Prongs..."

"Prongs, you git, answer your mirror!" 

"What do you want?" James Potter grumbled as he put his glasses on his face and lifted the mirror to answer his best friend. "It's one in the bloody morning."

"Just come to the front door, would ya?"

Rubbing his eyes, James meandered down the stairs. 

"You couldn't have just come over tomorrow?" he asked as he opened the door, stopping short as he caught sight of his visitor. There stood Sirius Black, hand holding the railing to keep balance on a leg that was clearly turned the wrong way, with a black eye forming. "What the bloody hell happened to you, Padfoot?"

"I'm fine, really," Sirius replied as he hobbled into the house and onto a couch. 

"If you're fine, the Cannons are winning the next World Cup," James rolled his eyes as he realized just how hoarse his friend sounded. "Mimi!"

"No, honest, I don't need-"

"Yes, Master James?"

"Can you get Sirius here a glass of water? And something cold to put on that eye."

"Of course."

"Now, be still," ordered James as he crouched beside Sirius. "I'm going to try to fix your leg. Although you are usually the one who does the Healing spells and seeing as how you won't tell me what happened I really ought to just leave you here in pain until you tell me but then I'm sure that Mimi will decide to heal you and she's sure to be more gentle than me, which we just can't have and-"

"Want to know what happened? My bloody mother happened. Apparently I'm enough of a shame to my father's memory that she hexed me down the stairs and Crucio'd me when I tried to come back up for my stuff. So I got out, caught the Knight Bus, and came here instead. That's what fucking happened. Now are you going to fix my leg or should I look into getting a wooden one like that Auror Moody?"

"Episkey," James whispered while handing Sirius the ice pack and goblet of water his house elf had just delivered. 

"I'll leave in the morning, really," Sirius mumbled as he struggled to sit up straight. 

"Sirius Black, you'll do no such thing," scolded James' mother as she strode into the room. "I've barely seen you all summer and James doesn't give me nearly as much interesting gossip as you do. You will stay in the guest room across from James' until we all leave for King's Cross on September 1st. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, Effie," smiled Sirius. 

"And you'd better be glad I'm fond of you as well, trying to get away with calling me Effie. My name is Euphemia Potter and I am quite proud of it. Now, to bed with the both of you." She kissed both boys on the top of the head, looking for all the world as if she did not notice the state her guest was in. "I'll have Mimi whip up some of those scones you like in the morning."

"Thanks, Mrs. P."

"And, Sirius?" The boy turned at the top of the stares to answer her. "For what it's worth, Walburga is a damned fool."


	3. Chapter 2: Chocolate Frogs

On the Hogwarts Express, Sirius was finally beginning to settle in. He'd seen his mother on the platform, telling Regulus goodbye, but he's simply given Mrs. Potter a kiss goodbye and gotten on the train as if he had never met Walburga Black. Sirius had expected to see his mother. Now, he expected to play Exploding Snap with Peter and to try and forget the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black existed. 

"What are you doing here?" Remus asked threateningly as a younger Sirius opened the door to the compartment. 

"Don't worry, I'm not staying," Regulus replied, holding a small box out to his brother. "Here, figured you'd need this. Won't be as fun to beat your lot in Quidditch if you don't have your broom."

Cautiously, Sirius opened the box and looked inside to find the entire contents of his school trunk, including his broomstick. "Reg, tha-" but Regulus had already left and headed to another compartment. 

"Anyone want anything from the trolley? I'm starving," said James finally in an attempt to break the awkward silence which had descended upon the compartment. 

"Chocolate frogs, definitely," responded Peter as he shuffled the Exploding Snap cards. "I'm still trying to find that new Dumbledore card."

"Done." 

James ran his fingers through his hair as he joined the queue waiting for the trolley. Sirius had not said a word about his family since he'd arrived at James's door three weeks ago and the silence that followed Regulus's appearance was enough to drive anyone mad. Maybe Peter would be able to get Sirius to talk. Or Remus, he'd always been good at-

"Oh, I'm so sorry." James felt someone bump into his back, stepping on his left heel. "I wasn't watching where I was going at all."

"It's fine," James smiled and turned to see a redhead standing behind him. "Actually, Evans, I meant to talk to you at the end of last term but you weren't exactly easy to locate. Did you get my letter?"

"Oh. I did, yes," Lily bit her lip. 

"Right, er..." James could not seem to get his words to make sense. "I wasn't sure you'd be too keen on hearing from me after the whole thing that happened, you know when Snape called you... what he called you but I just, er, I wanted to apologize. I was a bit of a prat." 

"A bit?" Lily cocked one eyebrow. 

"Okay, so a whole prat then. But seriously, Evans, I am sorry for being rude to you."

"Do you plan on ordering something, dear?" interrupted the older woman in charge of the trolley. 

"Er, yeah. Some Bertie Bott's, licorice wands, er, pumpkin pasties, and... yeah I think that's good for now." 

"Just some chocolate frogs for me," Lily said as she pulled out her coins. 

"And her chocolate frogs," James held the money out to the woman. "I'd like to pay for those as well."

"You'll be Dorcas's hero," said Lily as she carried her snacks. "She's the one who collects all the cards. I just eat them."

"Then make sure Dorcas knows she is very welcome." 

"Will do... Hey, Potter?" Lily stopped with one hand on the door of her compartment. 

"Yes?"

"I accept your apology, even if you are a whole prat."

_Yes. She doesn't hate me._  
James's stomach gave an odd flip he was sure was due to hunger. He opened a pumpkin pastie with his teeth as he joined his friends. 

"No chocolate frogs?" Peter frowned, his eyebrows singed from the cards. 

"Chocolate frogs? How'd you know about that?" 

"Know about what?" Remus looked up from the Prophet bemusedly. "That Wormtail's been collecting chocolate frog cards since first year?"

"Nothing," sighed James, leaning his head against the windowpane. Eventually, he dozed off, dreaming of the color red.


	4. Chapter 3: Fleamont and Annaliese? Ivy?

"Marchbanks, Mary Elizabeth!" 

"Is it just me, or are there a lot of double names this year?" asked Sirius as he tapped his fingers on the Gryffindor table. 

"Some names sound nice that way," shrugged Remus as "Marshall, Martin Lee" was sorted into Hufflepuff. 

"My parents considered it," agreed Dorcas Meadowes. "Although I still contend that Dorcas Ann would be too much to say every time someone wanted my attention. What's your middle name, Remus?"

"John."

"John?!" sputtered Sirius. "But that's so _normal._ At least Orion is interesting."

"Interesting isn't always better," replied Peter. "You try walking around with a middle name like Pisces."

"Pisces?" Sirius laughed. "Blimey, Pete, you have it almost as bad as James." 

"Don't," James glared as "Sullivan, Katie Lynn" joined the Ravenclaw table. "Sirius Black, don't you dare. It would be breaking the sacred Marauder bond."

"Oh, now we have to know," grinned Dorcas. 

"I don't know, Meadowes. I would be breaking the sacred Marauder bond and all."

"I'll give you the rest of my chocolate frogs if you tell me." 

"Deal," agreed Sirius without argument. Chocolate frogs had been his favorite since Christmas first year when his mother called them "ghastly mudblood treats."

"Er... I don't actually have any more chocolate frogs. Lily?"

"If it makes Potter this obviously uncomfortable, it must be good. I'm willing to part with the frogs." Lily smiled and held out the candy in question just as Professor McGonagall carried the sorting hat away and Professor Dumbledore rose to speak. 

"Welcome, students to another wonderful year at Hogwarts! I would like to remind you all that the Forbidden Forest is indeed forbidden for a reason. Mr. Filch would also like to remind you that Zonko's products are banned from the castle and should not be brought in. Also, I would like for you to all join me in welcoming our newest Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, Professor Panworth. I encourage you all to seek his advice in these dangerous days, as well as the advice of the rest of your esteemed educators. And now for the two most important words I'll say to many of you- dig in!"

"Alright, Black," said Lily as she piled her plate with rolls. "What is this mysterious nickname?"

"Fleamont," Sirius smiled as he dug into his own meal. 

"No, really," laughed Dorcas. "That's not even a name." 

"Yes it is. It's James's middle name."

"Knew I should've waited to hand those frogs over," glared Lily. "You're just having a go with us."

"No, honest," Sirius laughed as James'a face quickly turned to match the tomatoes on his plate. "That's his name."

"It's my Dad's name," James grumbled as he speared a piece of chicken with his fork, looking all the angrier when Lily burst out laughing. "What's your middle name then, Evans?"

"So sorry," she smirked. "I'm afraid that's not information I'll give so easily."

"Ooh this is good then," smiled Sirius. "Meadowes? Fancy trading these frogs for Evans's middle name?" 

"Not a chance," replied Dorcas. "Our friendship is too strong to be sold out for some chocolate."

"I bet it's something boring," shrugged Peter. "Elizabeth or something."

"Is it Elizabeth?" James asked as Lily shook her head. "Anne? Margaret? Katherine?"

"You'll never know," Lily responded mysteriously as she rose from her seat. "Remus? Are you ready to lead the first years?"

"I will find out, Evans!" James called as the pair walked away. "Just you wait!"

Though Lily did not give their conversation another thought, James continued to brainstorm as he drifted to sleep that night. Walking to breakfast, his mind continued to focus on his red-haired classmate for some reason. 

"Annaleise?" 

"Who's Annaleise?" Kiara Shacklebolt asked, taking a piece of bacon as she and Lily sat down at the Gryffindor breakfast table. 

"I'm trying to guess Evans's middle name," replied James. "Was I right?"

"No," laughed Lily. 

"Fine, then. Let's try another flower - Daisy? Rose? Ivy? Petunia?"

"Ivy is my mother and Petunia is my sister so no."

"Okay, neither of those. Lilac? Tulip? Gardenia?"

"It's not a flower," said Mary McDonald as she slid into the seat next to Remus. 

"Mary! No hints," Lily scolded. 

"I've got it!" 

"Yes, James?" 

"Minerva! It's got to be."

"And what exactly has 'got' to be me, Mr. Potter?" inquired Professor McGonagall, gazing at the Gryffindor students curiously. "Please tell me you're not already planning pranks."

"Of course not, Professor," smiled James sweetly. 

"Yeah, we're not totally terrible trouble-makers" Sirius chimed in. 

"Daft dysfunctional dolts," added Peter. 

"Mindless mischievous micreants."

"Negligent ninny naer-do-wells." 

"Babbling, bumbling baboons."

"Nice one, Padfoot."

"Why thank you, Wormtail."

"If you're quite done," Professor McGonagall interrupted. "I have your NEWT schedules here. Let's see...   
I am pleased to note that all of my sixth-year Gryffindors were able to continue into my NEWT-level Transfiguration. I do expect you to make me proud." 

"Yes, professor." 

"Speaking of which, it is nearly 9. Wouldn't do for you to lose house points due to tardiness on the first day of term."

"Not a problem for me," smiled Mary. "You lot enjoy Potions. I believe I'll go give myself a manicure in Gryffindor Tower."

"Mind if I walk with you?" asked Peter. "I wasn't mad enough to continue Potions either." 

"That's because he didn't have the marks for it," whispered Remus as the rest of the Gryffindors began making their way to the dungeons. 

"It does help to be one of Sluggy's chosen," remarked Sirius. "Like a certain redhead who may remain nameless." 

"Oh, please," Lily waved him off, taking a seat beside Dorcas. "Slughorn loves me because I'm brilliant. I'm not brilliant because he loves me." 

"Miss Evans!" cried the portly professor as the group entered. "So good to see you!" 

"You as well, Professor," she replied as Sirius and Remus made kissy-faces at her behind his back. "How was your holiday?"

"Oh, it was just lovely. Why I had a visit from Damocles Belby, I believe he'd already left Hogwarts by the time you all arrived, but he was telling me about the most fascinating research he's been doing on a new potion. Now don't try and get me to tell you what it is because I won't! You'll have to wait and see in the Prophet like everyone else!"

"Of course, Professor."

"Now, now, we must be patient! Although I will say it may come quite in handy around the full moon once he's finished!"

"The full moon?" Remus repeated from his seat next to Kiara. 

"Yes, yes, but really I cannot tell any more than that. Work to do, work to do."

Work to do, indeed. By the end of the month, the sixth-years certainly felt an end to summer holidays. It seemed that every professor was under the assumption that the NEWT-level students had copious amounts of time to spend on each subject. This was especially rough for Dorcas, Sirius, and Remus, who were taking six NEWT classes to their friends' five. 

"Do you reckon they meant to give us a time-turner when we passed OWLs? Seems the only way we'll get everything done," Sirius complained one evening in the Gryffindor common room. 

"Do you even know how dangerous time-turners are? They've only just been invented," Kiara rolled her eyes. "The day McGonagall gives out time-turners for classes is the day someone breaks out of Azkaban."

"Hey, Potter," interrupted seventh-year Gideon Prewett. "Got any idea when Quidditch practice will start up?" 

"Thursday at seven," James replied quickly. "Just got the pitch booked. Spread the word, will you?"

"Don't know what we're going to do when the twins graduate," sighed Sirius, all pretense of working abandoned. "They're like a pair of human bludgers themselves. Not to mention how you and I are going to break in a new chaser without Zoe Freeland"

"Why don't we focus on winning this year before we worry about that?" said James. "At least the team's all got some experience. Plus, Leslee Jordan's only in third year and Marcus Allen is in fifth so the team can carry on even after you and I leave."

"It's only Quidditch," said Dorcas. 

"Only Quidditch?" Lily repeated as she and Remus strode through the portrait hole. "Only?"

"Yes, yes, Quidditch is awesome, whatever," Dorcas turned her attention back to her Ancient Runes textbook. 

"How was patrolling?" asked Sirius. "Lots of full broom cupboards?" 

"Nothing interesting," answered Lily, glancing at Kiara. "I think I'm heading up to bed though." 

"I'll join you; this work isn't getting any more down tonight." 

"So will I."

"Kinky," smiled Sirius. "We just need McDonald to complete the picture. Where is she anyway?"

"Don't be weird," responded Dorcas as she continued to walk with her dormitory-mates towards the staircase. "She's off on yet another date. I think with Alex DuPont? Who knows really."

"McDonald on a date and you really didn't see anything interesting? Must not have been patrolling too hard, Moony."

"Oh we saw something interesting, all right."

"I thought Lily said you didn't?" asked Peter. 

"Didn't want to say anything in front of Kiara. We caught her brother, you know Kingsley? The second year? He and his friend Bryan Lloyd were fighting two Hufflepuffs. Beating them quite badly, I will say proudly."

"Why?" asked James, rolling up his essay. "Did you find out?"

"Apparently one of the Hufflepuffs, Selwyn I think it was, made a crack about Lloyd being muggle-born. Though of course he used another m-word. Our dear Kingsley felt the need to help Selwyn broaden his vocabulary a bit."

"Tell me you didn't take points. The kid totally deserved it." Sirius shook his head in disgust. "Twelve years old and spreading that kind of filth."

"Of course not! But according to Lily, the Shacklebolts told Kingsley and Kiara both to hold their punches. You know their dad's in the office of International Magical Cooperation. Having his kids getting into duels isn't exactly the type of thing that's going to help his reputation."

"Screw his reputation," said Sirius. "Have you seen the dung that's been in the news lately? More disappearances, more normal people suddenly deciding to off their whole families as if that could be anything but the Imperious. It's bloody ridiculous."

"All the more reason to lay low if he's going to do any good," argued Remus.

"Any of you lot want to play a game of chess?" Peter interrupted. "This political talk is just right depressing."

"I'll play," agreed Remus. "Just let me run up and get the set."

"I'll walk with you," said James. "I think I'm going to turn in. Fancy getting a fly in before Potions tomorrow."

"Remus?" he asked when the two were safely alone in the dormitory. "When you were on patrols, Evans didn't, I don't know, mention me or anything?"

"No, James," his friend answered bemusedly. "You didn't really come up."

"Right, right. No reason I would really."

"Should you have been brought up?"

"No. I mean, if she wanted to talk about me, that's fine. But there's not really anything to talk about, er, not that there should be just, er, nevermind."

"Right," Remus nodded, trying not to laugh. "You sure you're alright?"

"Yeah. Of course. Spiffing."

"Alright then. G'nite, Prongs."

"G'nite. And Moony?"

"Yes?"

"Maybe don't mention that conversation to anyone? I sounded like an idiot."

"Marauder's honor."

"Thanks, mate."


	5. Chapter 4: Loyalty of Lions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There is slight mention of past sexual assault near the end of this chapter. There is also some slut shaming, although the other characters quickly call the person saying it out and point out that this is unacceptable.

"Excuse me!" cried Lily as she pushed past a second-year and hurried down the corridor. "Pardon me!" She checked her watch yet again, willing it to slow. She'd been so wrapped up in talking to Alice Fawcett about her upcoming wedding that the girls had completely lost track of time. 

"Sorry, Professor," Lily panted as she skidded into the Defense classroom. 

"Miss... Edwards, was it?"

"Evans," grumbled James as he rolled his eyes. 

"Evans, sir," Lily corrected with more tact than the black-haired boy across the room. "Lily Evans." 

"Ah, yes," nodded the professor. "Five points from Hufflepuff for tardiness. Now if you'll have a seat-"

"But sir!" interrupted Benjy Fenwick. "She's in Gryffindor. We're just sharing the class with the Gryffindors." 

"Yes, yes, as you said. Miss Evans? Your seat?"

Lily tried to curb her annoyance as she walked to the spot beside Remus. She was never late, overly punctual really, and of course the one time she runs behind it's for Professor Panworth who knows nothing about her. Flitwick would've never taken points. "Really shouldn't be taking points when you don't know what house to take them from."

"Lighten up, Evans," Sirius turned from his seat in front of her. "I lose more points than that daily. They're always made up."

"I guess," she sighed, growing even more irritable at the sound of Althea Morrow's incessant giggling. Even as Panworth began his review, Sirius turned back to the front and placed a hand on her knee, causing Althea to giggle all the more. 

"I see how you ended up with the empty seat," Lily whispered, pointing at the pair in front of them. 

"Didn't you know? Padfoot is apparently smarter than Dumbledore himself. He has no need to pay attention during class when he could be flirting with anything that moves." Remus grinned. 

"Now today's lesson," Professor Panworth continued at the front of the room, "will focus solely on werewolves. Are any of you able to name ways to identify werewolves?" Remus stiffened. 

"Other than the howling and the fur?" said Benjy. James glared at him and stuck a hand in the air. 

"Shorter tail and snout than plain wolves, around seven feet tall, claws on the back paws as well as the front," he recited quickly. Lily almost thought he sounded as if he were trying to get something over with. 

"Very good. And ways to kill them?" 

Remus's quill snapped in half. 

"No need to," shrugged Sirius. "Just get out of the way until the full moon is over."

"But they're terrifying!" Althea argued. Sirius opened his mouth as if to say something but closed it just as quickly, though Lily did notice that his hand left Althea's thigh. 

"Exactly," nodded the Professor. "Werewolves are extremely dangerous. Why, in the last twenty years..."

Lily watched Remus carefully as she tuned the professor out, thinking of the theory her ex-friend had repeatedly shared. She'd never put much stock in the theory, as it didn't seem to matter much whether Remus were a werewolf or not, but she could not fight the curiosity overtaking her. 

_He does look rather pale. And it would make sense for Sirius and James to know, doubt he could keep that a secret from them. Professor Dumbledore would have to know. And McGonagall, of course. Doubt they'd have told Panworth with Defense getting new professors so often. Not to mention how often he gets sick._

The more Lily thought, the more it seemed to make sense to her. She barely noticed what Professor Panworth was saying, or the remarks Peter, James, and Sirius would occasionally throw in. She did not miss the tension evident on Remus's face. She did not miss the furtive glances the other boys shot his way. 

_Poor Remus,_ Lily thought. _It must be awful._ She barely noticed the class being dismissed until Remus shot out of his seat and headed out of the room as quick as lightning. 

"Just leave him be, Wormtail," she heard James whispering as she walked behind the three Marauders to the Great Hall for lunch. "He'll come back when he feels like coming back."

"Still think we should've done something big to shut Panworth up," Peter argued. 

"But that's not what Remus would want," said Sirius, surprising Lily as he took his friend's feelings into consideration. "He'd just have been embarrassed you know he would."

"Doesn't mean we can't play a nice little prank to welcome our new professor to Hogwarts, though," James grinned as the three boys began brainstorming, taking seats at the Gryffindor table near Remus as if nothing were wrong. 

"So what do you boys think of Panworth so far?" asked Lily boldly, as she sat down on the other side of Peter. 

"Er... He's fine," said Sirius. 

"Reminds me a lot of a pig," Lily continued as she filled her goblet with pumpkin juice. "You know, like the three little pigs? All trembling in fright over the big bad wolf?" James and Peter looked at her confusedly, though Remus gave a snort of laughter. It was Sirius who found the most humor in her comparison. 

"That's bloody brilliant," he managed to get out during guffaws. 

"What do pigs have to do with it?" Peter asked. 

"I'll explain it later," Sirius answered, still laughing. "Though I still say you lot should've taken Muggle Studies with me. Thanks for the idea, Evans."

"I have no clue what you're talking about," she smiled. "No prank ideas here. Just sharing an observation. What you do with it is your choice." With that, she moved down the table to join her dormitory mates, content in knowing that Remus no longer looked as miserable. 

"What was that about?" asked Dorcas. 

"Nothing," Lily shrugged. 

"Nothing? Really? You don't usually choose them over us." 

"I didn't choose anyone," Lily sighed. "We were chatting. There are only eight of us six-year Gryffindors as it is. We may as well all be friends."

"Thank Merlin all the groups aren't this small," said Mary. "16 boys and 16 girls per year?" 

"Oh, the horror of not having an endless boy buffet," Kiara rolled her eyes. 

"We can't all meet our soulmates in fourth year like you," Mary glared. 

"I've known Otis my whole life."

"And dated him since fourth year! My point still stands."

"Yes, well," Kiara sighed. "It would be a lot easier for you to have a long-term relationship if you would spend more than one night per bloke." With a sharp gasp, Mary grabbed her bag and stormed from the Great Hall. 

"I can't believe you said that to her," said Dorcas. 

"She needs to hear it. I love her enough to tell her the truth."

"That's not fair, Ki," argued Lily. "You know she's been weird about dating since that whole thing with Mulciber trying to Imperius her."

"Still can't believe he wasn't expelled,"said Dorcas, shaking her head. 

"Exactly my point," Kiara nodded. "Nothing happened to him and she's letting it ruin her life. That whole incident was the beginning of fifth year. We're already in October of sixth and she was doing the same thing all summer. It's time to move on."

"It's not as if that's an easy thing to do," Dorcas frowned. 

"So the solution is choosing to shag whatever bloke she can? I'm just trying to help her."

"We know that," said Lily as she placed a hand on Kiara's shoulder. "It just didn't come across the right way." 

"Fine," her roommate groaned as she stood up from the table. "I'll go apologize before Charms."

"She'll be fine," said Dorcas. "Things have been pretty tame so far this term. I just hope they stay that way."

They wouldn't.


	6. Chapter 5: Muggleborn Research Committee

James was so intent on his reading of the Daily Prophet that he didn't even notice his best friends walking in until Sirius took a seat beside him. 

"What's so interesting? Cannons finally win a match? You haven't even looked over at Panworth's pig's tail."

Wordlessly, James passed the newspaper over. 

"Muggleborn Research Initiative?" Sirius read. "This can't be real." 

"Oh but it is," James ran his hand through his hair. "They're even trying to make it sound like a good thing. 'Finally putting rumors to rest.' As if anyone's mad enough to believe that."

"I don't know," Remus frowned. "They may be able to convince a few. You know how tense things have been."

"How do they say muggleborns got their magic then?" asked Peter as he took a bite of his omelet. 

"Won't admit to one theory but they mention stolen magic a good bit," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Alice's mum's got a nice quote in here though. 'June Fawcett, owner of Fawcett Herbs and Fungi, stated that she is sure any research will show that muggleborns are born with magic. 'If you know who's coming up with these theories, send them my way. I could use some of them as fertilizer.'"

"Can magic even be stolen?" Peter asked. 

"Of course not," Remus sighed. "If it could, there'd be no Squibs left. It's mental."

"Downright nasty is what it is," James said as he ripped his toast into little pieces. "Some asshole who thinks his bloodline makes him better than everyone trying to make other people agree with him. If having pure blood make anyone so great, they wouldn't all be in Slytherin. Besides, there's plenty of muggleborns who are great with magic. Alex DuPont is better with Magical Creatures than anyone I know and he'd never even heard of a hippogriff until Hogwarts. Evans is muggleborn and she can kick anyone in our year's arse in Potions or Charms. And she's-"

"Headed this way," interrupted Remus, attempting unsuccessfully to hide the newspaper under a goblet. 

"Evans!" shouted Sirius, standing up between her and the table. "So good to see you! Fancy a walk?"

"Er, no," she replied. "Was actually planning on eating breakfast like a normal person."

"Ah, yes, excellent. Let's find a spot somewhere else. This part of the table's a bit crowded."

"I actually needed to speak with Remus about trading patrol nights..."

"That's fine!" Remus cried. "Splendid! See you later!"

"Right. Or you could hand me the newspaper you're obviously trying to hide?"

"Oh, I actually haven't had a chance to read that yet."

"You're really an awful liar, Lupin," said Mary as she snatched the paper from the table. "Now let's see if I can figure out what's so secretive... Oh."

"What?" asked Lily as she nudged Sirius out of the way to get a better view. "The muggleborn research committee? People really think we stole magic to get here? I didn't even know magic existed until McGonagall showed up at our house."

"We know that, Lil," Sirius put his hand on her shoulder. "Anyone with sense knows that."

"But not the Department of bloody Mysteries," she argued. "Not the ministry that's supposed to know better." She turned and walked out of the Great Hall. 

"Shit," said Sirius. 

"Should someone go after her?" Remus asked. 

"No," Mary sighed as she took a seat beside the boys. "No offense, but it's not as if you lot have to deal with this tosh the way we do. Probably best to leave her be for now."

"Neither of you should have to deal with it either!" James argued, punching the table. He quickly stood and walked out of the Great Hall, unsure as to why he was so angry. While pureblood hypocrisy always bothered him, something about the sight of Lily so dejected filled him with rage. James checked his watch as he stormed towards the doors of the castle. He wouldn't be able to fly before class but he could at least walk around the grounds to burn some energy. 

_"Furnunculus!"_ James turned the corner in the corridor just in time to see Evan Rosier break out in boils. Alice Fawcett was standing mere feet from him with her wand raised, a look of disgust on her face. Against the wall, a younger girl sat, her eyes widened in fear. 

"You'll wish you hadn't done that," sneered Rosier. "I have friends in higher places than you might imagine."

"Friends that care to hear about you hexing first years?" Alice scoffed. 

"Friends that have no patience for blood traitors," Rosier shrugged. "Though I seem to recall seeing your dear mummy's name in the Prophet in relation to that already today."

"What's she got to do with any of this?" Alice asked, bewildered. 

"Nothing, nothing. I just know of some people who found her comments to be very... interesting," Rosier smiled, pointing his wand at her. 

_"Protego!"_ James shouted, stepping forward with fire in his eyes. "Get out of here while you have the chance, Rosier." For a moment, it seemed as if Evan would fight back. Seeming to decide that he could not take on Alice and James at once, however, the Slytherin turned and walked away. 

"What was that about?" James asked. 

"Caught the oaf trying to hex poor Emma here. You alright?"

"Fine," the first-year nodded. "Thanks."

"Don't worry about it," Alice shrugged. "But you might want to go find the other Hufflepuffs before class." Emma quickly got up and hastened away. 

"Bloody git," James shook his head. "What would he want with a first-year?"

"Giving her shit for being muggleborn," Alice rolled her eyes. "As if that ought to matter."

"I'm so sick of hearing that. We're pureblood and we don't act like that! My mum would kill me if I started spewing that nonsense and your parents would do the same to you."

"As they should," Alice nodded, checking her watch. "But now I have to get to Defense." 

"Ah, yes. Have to fit classes in around that busy hexing schedule of yours," James smirked. "Think you can make it to class without getting in another duel?" 

"I'll try," Alice laughed. "Doubt Frank would be happy if I failed Defense and he had to go through Auror training alone." 

The rest of Alice's day was uneventful. She went to class, had dinner with her friends, spent some time with her fiancé in the Common Room, and completed an essay for Charms. By the time she went to sleep that night, Alice Fawcett had forgotten all about her argument in the corridors. Unfortunately for her, Evan Rosier had not. And neither had his father or his father's master.


	7. Chapter 6: The Cost of Speaking Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: minor character death mentioned

Saturday, October 30, 1976 was a lovely day. Hogwarts students enjoyed nice weather as they explored Hogsmeade for the first trip of term. Kiara Shacklebolt and Otis Bones spent the afternoon in a booth at Madam Puddifoots. Dorcas Meadowes, Lily Evans, and Mary McDonald visited Honeydukes to stock up on "emergency chocolate." Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew, Sirius Black, and James Potter spent quite a bit of gold at Zonko's Joke Shop while planning Sirius' birthday party for the following weekend. Alice Fawcett and her roommate Stella Johnson had drinks at the Three Broomsticks, discussing Alice's upcoming wedding. October 30th was a good day. 

Until it wasn't. 

Halloween, before her seventh year, was one of Alice's favorite days. She enjoyed the Feast in the Great Hall and the decorations. She loved Hagrid's giant pumpkins and drinking firewhiskey in Gryffindor Tower. In fact, Alice was mentally planning her outfit for the Gryffindor Halloween party as she walked back into the castle when Professor McGonagall approached and asked to speak with her in private. She waved bemusedly at her friends and followed the Head of House to her office. 

"Have a biscuit, Miss Fawcett," said Professor McGonagall. 

"Thank you," smiled Alice. "What's this about, Professor? Have we heard anything from the Auror Academy?"

"Not yet, although I have no concerns about your being accepted," answered the professor. "Actually, I have some news. Something happened today at your parents' shop." 

"The shop?" Alice repeated, the smile long gone. "Are they... Are they alright? Should I go to St. Mungo's?"

"There will be no need to go to St. Mungo's," Professor McGonagall frowned as buzzing began to fill Alice's ears. "So sorry...fiendfrye...trapped inside..."

Alice knew those words should make sense. They should mean something. They _did_ mean something. And yet, the buzzing was getting louder and louder in Alice's ears. She couldn't focus on the meaning at all. 

"Miss Fawcett?"

Fawcett. That was her name. Her parents' names. Fawcett Herbs and Fungi. 

"Alice?"

Alice looked at Professor McGonagall, blinked once, and ran out of the office. 

\--------------------------------------

"Lily!" Frank Longbottom burst into the Gryffindor Common Room, knocking a first-year onto the floor in his haste. 

"Frank?" Lily said, looking up from her Arithmancy textbook to stare at him confusedly. "Are you alright?"

"No, he replied bluntly. "I need Alice. Have you seen her?"

"What-"

"Please. Lily, have you seen Alice anywhere?"

"Er... No, actually. I don't even remember seeing her at lunch."

To Lily's further confusion, Frank nodded and rubbed his face. "That's exactly what I was afraid of."

"Frank? What's going on?"

"Can you go up to her dorm?" He asked, ignoring Lily's question. "See if she's there?"

"Did you two, er, have a spat?" She asked awkwardly. "No offense, because truly you're adorable together, almost obnoxiously so, but I don't particularly want to get in the middle of-"

"No, no. Not anything like that."

"Then what-"

"Lily," Frank put a hand on her shoulder. "Alice's parents were killed this morning. Their greenhouses and shop were burned to the ground. I've only just found out from Professor McGonagall. I should've been with her when she found out. I stayed behind from Hogsmeade to work on this damn essay for Ancient Runes and now she's alone..."

"How did this happen?"

"Pureblood supremacists, most likely," he sighed, tears glistening in his eyes. "That lot wasn't too happy with what Mrs. Fawcett had to say in the Prophet the other day."

"I'm so sorry," said Lily, standing to give her housemate a hug. "And so close to the wedding..."

"I don't expect Alice to leave her bed today or tonight," Frank replied. "But could you just take her a note for me?"

"Of course," Lily nodded, handing him a quill and sheet of parchment. 

"Thanks," he jotted down some quick words. "I'm not going to force her to be around anyone until she's ready but I do want her to know that I'm here when she is ready."

Morosely, Lily walked up the girls' staircase to the seventh-year's dormitory. Taking a deep breath to ready herself, she knocked on the door. 

"Alice?" She called when there was no response. "Alice, sweetheart, it's Lily. I have a note for you." She waited a few minutes and was turning to leave when the door finally opened. 

"Who's the note from?" asked Alice, standing in wrinkled robes with hair sticking in every direction.

"It's from Frank," answered Lily as she passed the parchment over. "He said he doesn't expect you to leave your bed but wanted to send along a message. I... I heard about your parents. I'm so sorry, Alice." 

"I still haven't cried," she said as she accepted Lily's hug. "Shouldn't I be crying? I just... I keep staring at bed hangings and I'm just so _angry._ It's like that damn fire has reached my heart and I couldn't put it out even if I wanted to."

"You have every right to be angry," Lily agreed. 

"So do you," argued Alice. "They do this same shit to Muggleborns just for existing."

"That doesn't make it okay," Lily shook her head. "All because of that quote in the Prophet?"

"They're trying to scare people," Alice glowered. "Well, I'm not frightened. I won't be backing off to hide in a bloody corner. I'm going to finish this year so I can go to the Auror Academy and take down every last one of these bastards."


	8. Chapter 7: "Adult" Padfoot

Lily, Kiara, and Dorcas had just sat down to breakfast on Wednesday morning when the Great Hall exploded. 

Red and gold sparks went off all around the room, as a firework dragon chomped its teeth at the students seated at the Slytherin table. Regulus Black seemed to be the only student unaffected, as he barely glanced at the dragon before rolling his eyes and returning to his breakfast. Above the staff table, fireworks spelled out "Happy Birthday, Sirius!" just as the boy in question entered the Great Hall. 

"Decent showing this year," Dorcas nodded in approval as the boys sat down at the Gryffindor table. 

"Well it isn't every day that you turn seventeen," replied James, placing a hand on Sirius's shoulder. 

"They grow up so fast," Remus wiped an imaginary tear from his eye. 

"Speaking of which," said Sirius. "Thank you for the firewhiskey. And how exactly did responsible ladies such as yourselves get ahold of Ogden's finest?"

"Summer birthdays do have some perks," smiled Dorcas. 

"Well it will come in handy Friday evening," Sirius said as he began opening the small amount of mail being dropped in front of him. 

"Hope people are feeling a little better by then," sighed Lily. "It's been three days and I still haven't seen Alice leave her dormitory. Not that the other seventh-years are doing a lot better."

"Probably too fat to come down the stairs from all the sweets you keep sending them," said Kiara. "You could feed an army."

"When somebody dies, you feed people," Lily shrugged. "I like baking. It's a lot like Potions, really."

"Trust me, this party will cheer everyone up," smiled James. "I hope you lot are prepared. Right, Padfoot?"

Sirius did not answer, as he was staring at the package in front of him. 

"What is it?" asked Remus warily. None of them had truly expected Sirius's family to send a gift and were planning to distract him from that. 

"It's a watch," Sirius held it up, sounding a bit choked. "From your folks, James."

"Do you like it?" James asked nonchalantly. "Mum was in a right state trying to decide which kind you'd want."

"It's perfect," replied Sirius as he put it on. "I'll write to her tonight to tell her. I need to write to Andromeda as well. She sent me a book on defensive spells and some picture her daughter drew."

"Is that supposed to be you?" Remus asked, taking the picture in question and squinting at it. "Looks almost like a house elf."

"Don't be silly," Lily snatched the picture. "It looks more like a dog than anything."

"You're all mad," Sirius replied over the sound of James' and Remus' laughter. "The kid's only three."

The rest of the day passed by as uneventfully as possible on a Marauder's birthday. Regulus at one point knocked Peter's books to the ground only to press a happy birthday note for Sirius into Peter's palm. Other than that, however, classes were attended and assignments were done. On Thursday, Alice Fawcett began attending classes again. By Friday, all anyone from fifth-year up could discuss was that night's birthday party in the Gryffindor common room. 

"I just can't decide!" cried Mary on Saturday night as she stared at the clothes strewn around the dormitory. "This is the first big party of the year."

"We were in the Ravenclaw Common Room two weeks ago for their party after they beat Hufflepuff in Quiddtich," Dorcas rolled her eyes and continued applying her makeup. 

"Gryffindor parties are better and you know it," argued Mary. "Kiara? Do you think the pink or the blue?"

"Blue. And borrow Lily's nude heels."

"Fine with me," shrugged Lily as she took a swig from the bottle of firewhiskey the girls were sharing while getting ready. She felt and odd nervous flutter in her stomach as she checked herself over again in the mirror, though she could not fathom why. The feeling did not disappear as the girls finished preparing and began to head downstairs. 

"You ladies look lovely as always," smiled Sirius when they entered the common room. Lily made eye contact with James but looked away quickly when the flutter in her stomach intensified. 

_Must have drank too much,_ she thought, though she refused to look back at him. 

James was experiencing the same troublesome flutters as Lily, although he couldn't have known how she was feeling. He shot an angry look at Fabian Prewett for calling Lily away to take "ginger appreciation" shots, trying to think of something clever to say. 

"Firewhiskey's awful for you," said Remus as he swiped a bottle from some fifth-year and took a deep swig while walking over to James. 

"Such a wonderful prefect you are."

"I'm preventing underage drinking by drinking everything myself. It's quite responsible."

"Your birthday isn't until March, Moony."

"These are minor details," smiled Remus. "Why are you standing over here by yourself?" 

"Just thinking," James shrugged. 

"Ah," Remus nodded thoughtfully as he passed the firewhiskey bottle. "About a certain classmate of ours?"

"Course not," James answered quickly, though he wouldn't meet his friend's eye. 

"Just ask her to dance, mate."

"Ask who to dance?" asked Sirius, popping up out of nowhere.

"No one!" insisted James. 

"Oi, Evans!" Sirius called, much to James' dismay. "Wanna dance?"

"Sure," Lily smiled and joined Sirius, who shot James a wink when she want looking. 

"Remind me to put some itching powder in his sock drawer," said James. 

In many ways, it was a typical Gryffindor party. Mary McDonald disappeared to an empty classroom with a random Hufflepuff boy. Fabian and Gideon Prewett found reasons to give everyone shots. Dorcas Meadowes and Peter Pettigrew sang along to every song as loudly as they could. Alice Fawcett even made a short appearance on Frank Longbottom's arm, although her smile never reached her eyes. The shift at this particular party stemmed from the fact that James Potter and Lily Evans could not stop looking over at each other. Lily thought it was the alcohol. James thought it was a silly crush. Neither one expected it to eventually change everything.


	9. Chapter 8: Amortentia

Over the next week, Lily did her best to ignore the butterflies she'd felt Friday evening. Though she told herself that she had no reason to care, she noticed that the Gryffindor boys in her year went to bed quite early Saturday evening. Noting the full moon, Lily smiled to herself at the idea of Peter, Sirius, and James waiting up for their friend. Not that she was smiling especially at James, of course, she was smiling at all of the boys as her friends. Fighting a blush, Lily forced herself to focus on what Dorcas was saying. 

"I still don't understand why crups aren't on the list of approved pets. It's not as if they're even dangerous! And they're precious and perfect."

"Precious and perfect? That's a fairly big compliment."

"The only thing precious and perfect I can name is Bilius Blishwick," said Mary, turning her copy of _Witch Weekly_ to show her friends. "Why are all the good singers American?"

"Aren't the Humming Hippogriffs performing in Wales soon?" asked Kiara, looking away from her Ancient Runes essay for the first time that evening. 

"But summer hols is so far away," Mary pouted. 

"Kiara will probably be too busy studying for NEWT's months in advance to notice," teased Dorcas. "Hope you remember us all when you become Minister Shacklebolt."

"Minister? I'm going to be the wealthiest curse breaker Gringotts has ever had."

"And I can write a feature on you in _Witch Weekly_ while Dorcas runs a petting zoo full of random creatures and Lily mixes up hangover potions to keep me sane."

"Because that's the only thing you do working with potions," Lily laughed. 

"It's what we appreciate most about you," Mary replied. 

"But you know Ki wouldn't be Minister Shacklebolt anyway," interrupted Dorcas. "She's going to be Mrs. Kiara Bones by then."

"Not arguing with that," the girl in question offered her friends a smile. 

"I'll be Mrs. Bilius Blishwick, obviously," Dorcas continued. "Mary will be the cool aunt traveling the globe. And Lily..."

Lily ducked her head quickly. Her face was beginning to match her hair as James arrived in her mind yet again, though she was able to shake it off rather quickly. 

"She'll have finally admitted her love affair with Slughorn!" Mary giggled, loudly enough that Frank Longbottom and Neville Ashworth looked up confusedly from their game of chess. As she and her friends continued laughing and talking, Lily mentally searched for some reason she would have James on her mind. Surely, she couldn't be starting to fancy him. 

Lily managed to convince that all she felt towards James was growing friendship through the next week. When he made her laugh in Charms, it was just because they were friends. When she smiled a little brighter at him entering the room, it was just because they were friends. Surely. 

When she took her seat next to Dorcas in Potions on Friday morning, Lily had been able to fight most of her thoughts away. She focused in on what her friend was saying and prepared her materials for class without even really noticing James enter with Sirius. 

"Can anyone identify the potion sitting on my desk?" asked Professor Slughorn. As soon as he took the lid from the cauldron, the most wonderful aroma filled the air. Lily smiled as she smelled Honeyduke's finest dark chocolate. 

"It's Amortentia, sir," answered Julia Hawthorne. "The most powerful love potion."

"Ten points to Ravenclaw," smiled Professor Slughorn. "And who is able to explain how Miss Hawthorne identified that?" 

"Its characteristic steam spirals of mother-of-pearl sheen," Severus answered almost lazily from his seat beside Evan Rosier. "It smells differently to each person depending on what attracts them."

Lily inhaled deeply, identifying the dark chocolate again as well as the daisies she associated with her mother's garden. But what could that other, more woodsy smell be? It was extremely difficult to identify. 

"Earth to Prongs," whispered Sirius across the room. "You alright, mate?"

"What? Yeah, er-fine," James stuttered, though he was anything but. 

"You're lucky Evans keeps staring down at her table and doesn't see you looking at her," said Sirius as he began chopping his ingredients. 

"Why would I be looking at her?"

"Making a love potion in the same room as the girl you fancy, enough to drive any bloke mad."

"Who said I fancied her?" James demanded in a whisper, as he had been very careful not to say any such thing. "We're friends." 

"Right," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Then what'd you smell when Slughorn opened the potion earlier?" 

"Nothing," James grumbled as a blush came across his cheeks. He rushed to grab his textbook and check the correct instructions for his work. Actually, James knew exactly what he'd smelled- broomstick polish, Mimi's treacle tart, and a vanilla scent that smelled eerily similar to Lily Evans' perfume. The last thing he needed was to broadcast that particular fact. He focused solely on his potion-making and refused to respond to Sirius' attempts at conversation, sighing when relief when Slughorn finally announced the end of the class period. Grabbing his things, James hurried past Lily and out of the dungeons. 

As James walked past, Lily got the whiff of something very familiar. Taking a moment to identify it, she dropped her potions supplies when she realized that James carried with him that same woodsy smell she'd inhaled from the Amortentia. 

"Here, let us help," Kiara said, reaching down to assist Lily.

"No, it's fine," argued Lily, wanting desperately to be alone with her own thoughts. "Really, you lot go on."

"We'll let Flitwick know where you are," said Dorcas, looking at Lily dubiously. 

"Right, splendid, great idea," Lily stuttered, trying not to think of James until they left. "See you there." She took another deep breathe as her friends departed, leaving her alone in the classroom. 

"Now really, Mr. Avery," she heard Professor Slughorn's voice coming from his office. "If you don't want Mr. Snape's assistance, Ms. Evans is excellent at Potions as well. I'm sure she'd be more than happy to tutor you if we asked."

 _Fat chance,_ thought Lily, as she had no intentions of helping the bully. 

"I don't need anything from a Mudblood," spat Avery. 

_Obviously you do,_ seethed Lily as she strode from the classroom, _seeing as how I'm the one doing well in Potions._ She was so focused on her thoughts that she was nearly to the dungeon stairs when she heard the footsteps behind her. 

"I know you heard that," said Avery. "And I wouldn't exactly appreciate you opening your big mouth about it."

"Thought you didn't need help from a Mudblood," Lily crossed her arms. She was expecting an argument. She was not expecting to be put in a full Body-Bind, her wand still tucked into her pocket. 

"You should learn when to shut up," Avery sneered from above her. "What, do your little Gryffindor buddies encourage that kind of shit? You're no better than a cockroach. And you know what I do to cockroaches?" Avery lifted his foot and brought it down hard repeatedly on her face and throat. Everything went black.


	10. Chapter 9: The Hospital Wing

Remus thought he might vomit, looking down at how still Lily was laying, blood caked under her nose and bruising around her throat. 

"Someone should let the girls know," Peter whispered. 

"James and Sirius, too," Remus said as he levitated his friend. "They'll want to be told." With a curt nod, Peter carried the map with him out of the dungeon corridor. 

_Thank Merlin we made that map,_ thought Remus, aware that Professor Slughorn's schedule allowed for a free period both before and after lunch. It was unlikely that anyone would've found her for at least another hour, had Mary not found him and Peter in the Common Room during free period asking after Lily. 

"What happened?" cried Madam Pompfrey when Remus entered the Hospital Wing. 

"Not sure," he sighed, levitating Lily onto a bed. "She didn't come to Charms or lunch so we all assumed she was ill or something until one of the girls checked the dormitory. Peter and I found her like this in the dungeon corridor." 

"My word," breathed Madam Pomfrey as she cast her diagnostic spells. "She has a broken nose, at least one broken rib, those eyes are going to be black..." Despite the unhappy diagnosis, Remus sighed in relief. He had full faith in Madam Pomfrey's ability to heal all of those. 

"What the hell happened?" demanded Dorcas, slamming the Hospital Wing door open, the rest of the sixth-year Gryffindors in tow. 

"She'll be okay," answered Remus. 

"She's bloody unconscious," Sirius argued. 

"Seems like a minor concussion," Madam Pomfrey tutted. "Which I require privacy to heal."

"Yes, Madam Pomfrey," Remus closed the curtains. 

"How could this happen?" Kiara slumped into a chair, clenching and unclenching her fist. 

"I already told you everything we know," answered Peter. "Mary told us you lot couldn't find Evans, we started walking around the castle, we found her down near the dungeons. Remus brought her up here while I went to fetch all of you."

"I knew we should've waited for her after Potions," Dorcas shook her head. "And then she didn't come to Charms, and Lily never skives off class, not to mention that she loves Charms..."

"Which is why we assumed she was ill, Dor," soothed Mary. "You couldn't have expected that." 

"She was acting odd at the end of Potions, though," Dorcas argued. "I just thought it was something about the Amortentia. It made all of us a bit mad."

Remus looked to James, who'd normally be interested in this sort of development (though he'd try to hide it of course), only to realize that his friend was holding his hand in an odd matter. 

"Prongs, are you bleeding?"

"It's nothing," James grunted. "I'm fine." 

"That's the first thing he's said since I told him," Peter whispered in Remus' ear. "Punched a wall and stormed up here. Fairly sure his hand is broken." Remus sighed. Normally, Sirius would've been able to handle the injury with ease but there would be no easy way to explain that skill to the non-marauders present. Remus looked to his long-haired friend who shook his head once, signaling that it wasn't worth the risk to heal James' hand so openly. 

"She needs rest," Madam Pompfrey announced, leaving Lily's bedsides and closing the curtains behind her. "And you all need your education. There's no sense in missing class to sit with someone who doesn't know you're here." The girls and James did not move. 

"C'mon mate," Sirius nudged James, as Madam Pomfrey tended to his injured hand. "We should tell McGonagall what's happened. Not to mention the girls will need notes, you know Evans is overly obsessed with her studies." Nodding once, the bespectacled boy allowed himself to be led from the Hospital Wing. 

Remus had never seen his friend so quiet, especially considering that Transfiguration and Defense were his favorite courses. Instead of volunteering answers or cracking jokes, James spent the afternoon silently and meticulously copying notes. 

Even James himself was not completely sure why he was so effected. Of course, Lily was his friend and no one deserves to be treated as she had been. The fact that he found her beautiful was irrelevant, he told himself as he snuck to the Hospital Wing under his invisibility cloak that evening. Silently, he placed that day's class notes on the table beside her bed and, unable to stop himself or really explain why he was doing so, reached out a hand to smooth Lily's hair behind her ear. 

"James?" she breathed, causing him to jump back. "You're... Er, you're awake?"

"Looks like it," she replied confusedly as she rubbed her eyes. "Are we in the Hospital Wing?" 

"Er, yeah," James stared uncomfortably at his feet. "Remus and Peter... They, er... They found you down by the dungeons."

"Right," Lily nodded in that matter-of-fact manner she had. 

"D'you want me to fetch Madam Pomfrey?"

"No," Lily answered, waving a hand. "Wouldn't want you to get a detention for being out after curfew." James nodded. 

"Er... James?"

"Yes?"

"Why _are_ you here so late? Mind, my eyes are pretty swollen so making I'm seeing things strangely but it seems pretty late."

"Just... Dropping off some lecture notes  
for you," James snatched up the parchment in question like a lifeline. 

"Oh. Thanks."

"Right," nodded James again, trying to fill the silence. "Er... Guess I'd better get back to Gryffindor Tower then."

"Sure," Lily nodded as well. "See you around then. G'nite, Potter."

"G'nite... Hey, Evans?" he called, hand poised over the Hospital Wing door. "Are chocolate frogs your favorite sweet?"

"I like them fine, although I adore the dark chocolate bars from Honeyduke's."

"Right," James nodded for the last time, turning the door knob. "See you around, Evans."

Madam Pomfrey, though she did not know of her patient's alertness Friday night, required that Lily remain in the Hospital Wing throughout the day Saturday, finally allowing her to rejoin the rest of the student body in time for breakfast Sunday morning. 

"I can prepare my own plate," Lily sighed exasperatedly as Dorcas and Mary both attempted to assist her. "Truly, I'm not an invalid."

Her argument was cut off, however, by the arrival of an owl carrying a large package heading straight for the redhead. Upon opening, she found a large package of dark chocolate from Honeyduke's.

"Someone sure knows how to cheer you up," commented Kiara. "Who's it from?" 

"There's no note," Lily shrugged, sneaking a look down the table at James, who ducked his head as soon as she caught his eye. Smiling, she grabbed her goblet from Mary's hand. "Let me pour my own bloody pumpkin juice!"

"I'm just trying to help," Mary mumbled. 

"I know, doll," Lily sighed. "But honestly, all that's left is this one scar on my hairline." 

_And that's only because I asked her to leave me a reminder,_ she added silently. 

"And you still can't remember who it was?" Dorcas raised an eyebrow. 

"No clue," Lily answered shiftily. Of course, she remembered Lawrence Avery standing over her. She also remembered how everyone, herself included, had treated Mary with kid gloves last term after he and Mulciber had attacked. 

"And you don't need anything," Dorcas prodded. 

"Nope," said Lily. "The only thing I'd really like is to learn some more of that self-defense Kiara's parents taught her."

"Consider it done," Kiara nodded. "Kingsley and I have been getting those lessons for years."

"Perfect," Lily nodded. "That's all I really want." 

_Because I refuse to be a victim. I won't have someone around to protect the Mudblood forever,_ she told herself, growing in determination to stick up for herself.


	11. Chapter 10: Lily's Boys

The aftermath of Avery's attack was taking more of a toll on Lily than the attack itself had. Though Kiara had begun teaching all of the girls self-defense, Lily doubted she would ever be allowed to use the techniques she was practicing. Everywhere she looked, one of her classmates was following behind or checking up on her. It had taken screaming at Benjy Fenwick, who the Gryffindors had recruited to stand in for them during Herbology, in order for Lily to get enough alone time to cast her Tongue-Tying charm on Avery, rendering the Slytherin incapable of saying the word "Mudblood". 

Her friends had even taken to following Lily down to the kitchens or the empty Potions classrooms, where she most liked to think. Even when she was able to shake them off, the boys in her year somehow had an uncanny ability to locate Lily when she was alone. 

"I am perfectly fine brewing a damn potion!" She shouted one weekend afternoon two weeks following the attack, not bothering to look up from her work. 

"I would assume so," Severus drawled as he entered the room. "However, this room does not exist solely for you."

"Sorry," Lily mumbled, feeling completely wrong-footed. "I thought you were someone coming to check up on me."

"I needed some newt eyes from the stores," Severus responded as he held up the ingredient in question. 

"Right," Lily nodded, hoping desperately that her ex-friend did not attempt to stay, ruining any chances of her brewing her intended potion in secret. 

"Do you need someone to stay with you?" Severus asked, looking as concerned as he ever was able. 

The comment made Lily's blood boil. The other Gryffindors, at the very least, she knew would stick up for her if ever needed. How dare he try and place himself in the same category?

"No," spat Lily. "What use would you be if something did happen, Severus? What, you'll make a nice cheering section for whatever pureblood fanatic decides to go after me?"

"Lily..."

"Shut up. If it were any other muggleborn in this school who'd been attacked, you wouldn't think twice," she rose from her seat in anger. "Don't you dare lie to me and pretend you give a damn about blood rights."

"Oh? Is that what precious Potter and his Gryffindor lackeys have told you?"

"Don't you dare bring them into this! Any of them is a better human being than you've been lately."

"Are you sure you can categorize all of them as human beings?" Severus sneered. "I believe you know my theory."

"Of course I know your ridiculous theory," Lily rolled her eyes, maneuvering her body in hopes that her ex-friend would not notice the ingredients or book she was using. "I've also heard the theory that you don't use shampoo." 

"Potter and his friends are heading down the wrong path. They'll all end up dead before they're 30." 

"At least it would be for the right reasons," Lily argued, sweeping her things back into her bag and heading to leave. "You're a coward, Severus." Shaking with anger, she stomped out of the dungeons. 

_At least he didn't seem to notice the pain-killing potion I'm working on for Remus,_ she consoled herself. _It'd be a bit hard to explain why I want to perfect that before the full moon without agreeing with his theory._ This thought was little consolation, as Severus had once been one of Lily's best friends. He'd been the one to first tell her about magic, to tell her that it didn't matter if she were muggleborn. 

_He's friends with Avery,_ Lily reminded herself. _and he didn't care at all when it was Mary being attacked._ Resolutely, she headed for her dormitory in order to eat the last of her dark chocolate, reminding herself that the Severus who would've once enjoyed sharing that treat was now gone. 

As the next few weeks passed, Lily was able to finally sneak down to the dungeons enough to perfect her newest project. While it was not uncommon to see Lily Evans working on a personal interest in the Potions dungeons, she did not want others questioning her sudden interest in muscle relaxing potions, particularly those typically used after human transfiguration. It took some experimenting but she was able to a strong potion whose taste would be masked by tea just in time for December's full moon. 

"Good morning, Remus!" Lily cried when he finally arrived in the Gryffindor common room Tuesday morning. "Fancy a cup of tea?"

"Er... No thanks," the lycanthrope replied. "Not that hungry, actually. Think I may go lay down until time for Potions."

"Nonsense!" Lily carried the mug to him. "It's my mum's recipe, she's only just sent it to me."

"My stomach's feeling a bit off..."

"A cuppa will make you feel better. Try some, I insist."

"Er... Alright," Remus gave his friend an odd look before accepting the drink. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome," Lily beamed. "And be sure to drink the entire thing. Mum's tea has a way of making everything nicer."

"Can I have some tea as well?" Mary asked, though Lily had not seen her come in. "I'd rather not walk all the way down to the Great Hall."

"Er... Of course!" Lily smiled awkwardly, sneakily vanishing the remaining liquid. 

"Oh, nevermind," sighed Mary. "It's all done. I'll head down to breakfast with the others." 

"Spiffing," Lily nodded, turning her attention back to her lab rat. "So, Remus, feel any different?"

"I do feel a bit more relaxed," Remus replied, swinging his arms back and forth. "I was a bit sore before. From, er, a late-night Quidditch scrimmage with the boys, yes, Quidditch-"

"Of course, I know how you lot enjoy Quidditch."

"Right, exactly, so I was sore, from the Quidditch of course, and now I feel much less sore. Thank you, Lily."

"Oh, I'm so glad you like it!" Lily smiled, attempting to hide her glee. "I just knew you would."

"Right. Er, let me get my things and I'll walk with you to Potions." 

Lily could not believe her luck. It had worked! Of course, Potions was one of her favorite subjects, but she hadn't been sure how well the ingredients would help a werewolf. And Remus hadn't even noticed! She'd have to make it again after Christmas hols, though it was a pity that she wouldn't see Remus for the January full moon. 

For the rest of the day, Lily remained on cloud nine. She could not stop smiling, even when she sat down in the library that evening to revise for her Transfiguration exam. In fact, she was so wrapped up in her victory that she never heard Gideon Prewett approach. 

"Lily?"

"Oh, hello, Gideon."

"Are you planning on going to the Slug Club Christmas social this Saturday?" he asked, sitting in the chair beside her. 

"I'd almost forgotten about it, to be honest."

"Well, remember last term when you were studying for O.W.L.s and I helped you prepare for Astronomy? Which you scored an Exceeds Expectations in, if I remember correctly." 

"Yes, Gideon," she laughed, thinking that she had an idea where this was going. 

"And you wrote me when you got your score and promised that if there were any way to repay me, any way at all-"

"What do you need?"

"Would you be my date on Saturday?" Gideon asked pleadingly. "I'm sure you'd rather go with a bloke you actually fancy but if you'd nearly forgotten then surely you aren't planning to ask anyone special."

"Of course," Lily agreed readily, privately thinking that she knew why her friend was unable to invite who he wanted. "I think we'll have fun."

"It'll be the time of your life," Gideon smiled, squeezing her hand. "Thank you!" 

"Meet me in the Common Room at eight!" Lily called as he left the library. 

Across the room, James stared at Gideon's retreating form. All he'd heard was that Lily was going to have the time of her life and that Gideon was going to pick her up at eight. Without realizing it, James snapped his quill in half.


	12. Chapter 11: The Christmas Party

"Moony, do you have a spare quill?" James asked, rummaging through his bag. "All of mine are broken." 

"Maybe if you'd stop glaring at Gideon, you'd have some more quills left," Sirius noted. 

"And maybe if you'd finished this essay last night like I'd told you to, you wouldn't be stuck working during free period on the last day of classes before hols," said Remus as he handed a quill over and returned to his game of chess with Peter. 

"And maybe I'll hide some acromantula eggs in your bed tonight," James glared. 

"You're terrified of spiders."

"Shove off, Peter," sighed James. "Let me get my insults out."

"Just saying, mate, might want to rethink that plan," Peter shrugged. 

"You're rubbish mates," said James. "I may replace you. Go spend some time with Longbottom and Ashworth." 

"Prewett's mates?" Sirius laughed. "Well that's a brilliant idea."

"I don't have a problem with Prewett!" James crossed his arms and scowled at his friends. 

"You get this distracted, angry look on your face whenever he enters a room," Peter argued. "You've been doing it all week."

"Do not," James muttered.

"You do know that they've been mates forever right?" Sirius interjected. 

"Who?" 

"Prewett and Evans."

"Why would I care about that?"

"Because you've never had a problem with Prewett until they decided to go to the party together?" Remus stared at his friend. "And ever since he asked her, you've been snapping quills and glaring at him?"

"No I haven't. I'm not mad."

"Alright, mate. Whatever you say," Sirius slowly patted James on the arm. "Let's just go off to class."

Silently, James stood and began walking with his friends. He didn't even notice when Sirius and Peter broke off toward History of Magic, leaving him alone to walk with Remus. Was he really acting as mental as his friends had said? Really, he had no sort of claim over Lily. Fancying your friend doesn't mean you should go around glaring at blokes who get dates with them. By the time he'd arrived at Care of Magical Creatures, James had made a firm resolution. He would not be a prat about this party. 

James was able to hold to his resolution, although it did increase in difficulty as the night drew nearer. He told himself it was perfectly normal to read _Quidditch Through the Ages_ in the Common Room. If he happened to have a clear view of the girls' dormitory stairs, it was simply a coincidence. 

Though it was certainly not an unhappy coincidence, James ceded as he caught a glimpse of a redhead walking down the staircase. She wore the most beautiful emerald green dress robes. The color brought out the green in her eyes, the most beautiful green James had ever seen. 

"Staying in the Common Room tonight?" Lily raised an eyebrow, flashing James a smile that made him momentarily believe that his heart had stopped working. 

_Stop being a prat,_ he scolded himself. _She's going on a date with someone else._

"Even I need a break sometimes," he shrugged. "You look beautiful." Probably shouldn't have said that but it had truly slipped out on its own accord. Besides, anyone who saw Lily Evans tonight would agree. 

"Thank you," she smiled, causing James to stop breathing yet again. "I figured green dress, red hair, may as well play up the whole Christmas theme." 

James was still trying to think of something, anything, to make her keep smiling at him that way. He'd almost gotten something when he heard Gideon Prewett's bellow from the boys' staircase. 

"Lily Vanilly! You look gorgeous!" 

"Thanks, Gid," she laughed and turned that smile towards her date. 

_Her date, you great git. Not you._

"See you later, James," the pair were waving, drawing the black-haired mess back to the present. 

"Yeah, see you," he nodded. "Have fun with old Sluggy."

As soon as they had walked through the portrait hole, James put his head in his hands. _I'm a bloody idiot._

 

\--------------------------------------

 

Lily was, in fact, having quite a bit of fun with "old Sluggy." Though the professor did have a troublesome tendency to treat her bloodline as something to overcome, he also had a tendency to introduce Lily to very interesting members of the magical world. 

"We have to dance; it's Celestina Warbeck!" her date announced, leading her away from Professor Slughorn and the famous Quidditch player he'd invited. 

"You're a fan of hers?" Lily laughed. "A little stereotypical, don't you think?" 

"Oi," Gideon responded as he twirled her. "I'll have you know that she is Molly's favorite singer. This album will be playing all of Christmas hols."

"Arthur must be a saint. I wouldn't be able to stand it."

"He's a good bloke," Gideon agreed. "Reckon he's happy to listen to anything other than the boys screaming at this point."

"They have what - four sons?" Lily tried to remember what she'd heard about Fabian and Gideon's older sister.

"Three," the uncle corrected. "Just had Percy in August. I reckon it's good that Fab and I will be getting a flat after graduation. Don't think they plan on stopping any time soon." 

"I'm sure Molly and Arthur would be fine with you sticking around."

"It's better if we get our own place," Gideon shook his head. "Don't want to risk it."

"Risk what?" Lily asked, lowering her voice. 

"C'mon, Lils. You know how bad things are getting. We're planning to do what we can to help. Not really the way to attract the type of enemies you'd want around your nephews."

"That's not your fight, Gid. It's mine. You and Fabian should be keeping yourselves safe." Though she was proud that her friends would be so willing to fight, Lily would fight for all three of them in order to keep the twins out of danger. 

"Don't be daft," Gideon rolled his eyes as a new song started playing. "D'you really think those tossers care about my rights either? If I'd shown up tonight with a bloke on my arm, I'd have been hexed before midnight."

"Gid..."

"Not that you aren't a lovely date. Just not one I'm going to end the night snogging in a broom cupboard."

"I still say you should just do what you want. Who gives a damn what a few idiots have to say about it?" 

"You talk a big game, Miss Spent-a-Weekend-in-the-Hospital-Wing. What those idiots had to say sure mattered then," Gideon raised his eyebrows, knowing he had a point. 

"Shut up," Lily rebutted eloquently. "Can't we just enjoy ourselves and pretend things are all wonderful?" 

"Whatever you'd like," Gideon laughed. "I live to please." And he did. The war was pushed to the back of both of their minds for the rest of the evening. For a few hours, Lily Evans and Gideon Prewett were even able to convince themselves that the war against Voldemort wouldn't touch their lives.


	13. Chapter 12: Mr. and Mrs. Longbottom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Expect this story to be updated on Tuesdays!

Author's Note: Look for updates to this story every Tuesday. (I know today is Monday but I'm really busy tomorrow.) Thanks for reading! 

 

"Honestly, James, your father invented a potion just to handle your hair. The least you could do is use it," Euphemia sighed as she tried to flatten her son's hair yet again. "You look so handsome in these dress robes and the hair looks as if it's never seen a brush."

"Don't reckon it has, Mrs. P," Sirius laughed. "Seeing as how he loves to muss it up."

"Well, at least one of my boys will prove that Sleekeazy's works," she kissed him on the cheek. "I'm going to go congratulate Augusta. You two behave yourselves and go easy on the firewhiskey, will you?"

"Yes, Mum," the two chorused, causing the older woman to smile. /

"Mum?" came an all-too-familiar voice from behind them. "I've never met anyone but the two of you who take being best mates to such extremes."

"Evans!" Sirius cried jovially. "I'll have you know that Effie there is the most amazing woman I've ever met."

"Duly noted," she nodded, attempting to look serious. "Although I do hope I'm second."

"That spot belongs to Minnie McG, I'm afraid. Though I'm sure there's a closet around here some place if you feel up to convincing me."

"If I ever care about his opinion enough to consider that, please hex me," Lily laughed, turning to James. 

"I could just hex him if you'd like," he smiled, forcing himself to remember that the last time he'd seen her was when she left with another bloke as he date. "Really, not a problem at all."

"I have never felt such betrayal!" Sirius cried. "Peter would never be so callous."

"Not to mention that Alice may murder you if you start hexing people in the middle of her wedding reception. It's all she's been focused on for the last month or so," Lily reminded them.

"And yet, I already know most of the birds here," Sirius shook his head sadly.

"Is that all you ever think about?" she asked. "Our friends are married! It's a big deal!"

"You're right, Evans," Sirius smirked. "We should celebrate. I'll go find some drinks. Why don't you and James here have a dance?"

"You really don't have to," James said quickly as Sirius winked over Lily's shoulder, already planning his retribution.

"Oh. We can. Er, if you want." She looked down and if James didn't know better, he'd have thought she was blushing. But of course she wasn't blushing. There was no reason for her to be. Wait, did she just suggest that they dance? He met her eyes to find that she was watching him expectedly.

"D'you want to dance?" he finally asked.

"Sure," Lily smiled. James reminded himself to inhale as she took his hand and began pulling him toward the dance floor.

"Pretty sure the bloke's the one who's supposed to lead," he managed to smirk, his voice suddenly deeper.

"Well by all means, Potter. Lead away. I'm ready to be dazzled."

"You're already dazzling me," he whispered without thinking, breathing a sigh of relief when she didn't seem to hear him. For a few songs, James was able to simply move with and look at Lily without putting his foot in his mouth.

"Would you like some punch?"

"Sure thing," she shot another one of those smiles at him. "I'll go find us some seats."

"You seem to be having fun," Sirius noted, appearing beside James at the punch bowl. "Pity Remus and Peter aren't here to see this."

"Sod off."

"No can do, my _dear_ Prongs. Shacklebolt's off with Bones some place and all of Alice's bridesmaids have spent enough time in the Common Room to stay away from me. I was trying to find some older birds but your dear mum chose that moment to appear so now I may as well be twelve. Remind me to thank her for that would you?"

"Probably did it on purpose," James laughed. "You know she thinks you're becoming a scarlet man. Is that a term?"

"It is now," Padfoot shrugged. "So how's Evans?"

"Fine..." James said evasively, running a hand through his hair. "Don't be a prat."

"I'm insulted that you would even think such a thing. I enjoy watching you stumble all on your own."

"I'm not stumbling through anything. I'm being some punch to my friend," James grumbled defensively as they approached the friend in question.

"Lily-petal!" James bit back a groan at the sound of Gideon Prewett's voice, knowing that Sirius would be watching him carefully. "Come dance with me before Mrs. Longbottom finds another job for the groomsmen to do. I swear McGonagall's giving her ideas just to watch us suffer."

"Well, James did just fetch me some punch," Lily shrugged, though James noticed that she was still smiling at Gideon.

"S'alright," he said, waving his arm towards the dance floor. "Go on and enjoy yourself."

"Oh," she replied, her expression unreadable. "Well, if you're sure..."

"I'll be fine," he argued, wishing she would just go off with Gideon like she obviously wanted to and stop embarrassing him.

"Alright..." Lily was looking at him with that inscrutable expression again. "C'mon, Gid. Let's get some use out of that pain-free charm Mary showed me for these heels."

"You don't want to dance with Evans?" Sirius asked as soon as the dancing partners had walked away.

"Of course I want to dance with her," James ran a hand through his hair and flopped into the chair Lily had just vacated. "But we're friends. We weren't even that close until this term. I gotta get over it."

"Well you know what I say, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else."

"You haven't gotten under nearly as many people as everyone says you have, Padfoot."

"D'you want my help or not?" Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm sure we can find a bird or two for you if that's what you really want. Freeland's out cause you're not messing up our Quidditch team. Stella Johnson and Katelyn Sanders are around here somewhere doing whatever bridesmaids do... I got it!"

"This ought to be good," James sighed.

"Hawthorne! She's Alice's cousin or something but she's right over there," Sirius explained. "Ravenclaw? In our bloody Potions class?

"I know who she is."

"Brilliant," Sirius slapped his friend on the back. "I'll get her for you." Before James was able to protest, his friend had walked over to the blonde Ravenclaw. He surmised that whatever Sirius said had worked, as Julia was heading towards him. James took another sip of his drink, wishing Sirius had been able to spike this punch. He took a deep breath, reminding himself that Julia was a perfectly lovely girl, and prepared himself for an evening of dull small talk.


	14. Chapter 13: Owl Post

Lily was very determinedly not thinking of James Potter. She refused to spend her holiday thinking of his smile or his hair. Or of the fact that he had wanted to stop dancing with her so quickly. She absolutely would not dwell on remembering how she'd gone to find him after a few dances with Gid, only to see James chatting up Julia Hawthorne. 

There was a lot she wasn't thinking about. 

"Honestly, Petunia," Lily could hear her mother's voice from downstairs. "Your sister won't be home much longer. You ought to spend some time with her."

"I made plans with Vernon," came her sister's haughty reply. "It would be rude to cancel on him."

"Why don't you take Lily with you? I'm sure she'd love a trip to the cinema."

"I'll remember that when I want to scare Vernon away," Petunia scoffed. "You know how she loves to use her _thing_. My hair was green for a week last summer."

"You spend too much time worried over your appearance," Lily shrugged as she joined her family in the kitchen. "Mum, honestly, Tuney's more than welcome to go out with Vermin without me if that's what she wants."

"Pet-un-ia," she enunciated, not seeming to notice her sister's new nickname for her boyfriend. "Tuney is a childish nickname."

"Be nice," Ivy sighed. "You girls are family."

"Yes, Mum," Lily agreed, privately thinking of a few members of Gryffindor Tower who felt much more like family to her than her darling sister. "I'm just going to do some reading on the swing."

"Not one of those freak books," Petunia pointed a bony finger. "What if someone saw you?"

"Didn't think anything of Mum's counted as a 'freak' book but I'll be sure to keep that in mind," Lily rolled her eyes and walked into the living room. As her eyes roamed the familiar shelves, she noted the book that has inspired her middle name. Lily laughed to herself as she pulled _Pride and Prejudice_ off of the shelf, thinking of all the time James had spent brainstorming new middle names for her and passing them in notes during class. He'd even started charming the notes into little paper birds to fly over to her desk, although Professor McGonagall had given him a detention for doing so. A tap at the window drew Lily from her thoughts. 

"Hello, Aurora," she smiled, opening the window to let the owl in. "Do you have a letter for me from Dorcas?" The tawny owl hooted in pleasure as Lily untied the parchment. "I have a treat for you upstairs." She smiled again as Aurora hopped onto her shoulder to be taken upstairs. Lily desperately wanted an owl of her own but her mother had taken Petunia's side and agreed it would not be allowed. Instead, she spent holidays waiting for Dorcas or Kiara to write and trying to form her replies quickly so that their owls would carry them back. 

"Do you think you could do a job for me?" Lily petted the owl. Struck with sudden inspiration, she took the happy hoot as a yes. She ran quickly back downstairs to grab _Pride and Prejudice_. 

"Can you deliver this to James Potter for me?" she asked, writing a quick note with pen and notebook paper from her desk. Aurora held out her leg. "I'll have an answer for Dorcas as soon as you're back here." The owl hooted once more and nipped Lily's finger before flying off. 

 

\---------------------------------------

 

James jumped out of bed at the sound of knocking, picking up the first thing he could reach in an attempt to look like he was cleaning. His mother had sent him and Sirius both upstairs to tidy their bedrooms hours ago, reminding them that Mimi had enough responsibilities and that they were more than old enough to pick up after themselves. So far, all James had done was reread the latest Puddlemere United newsletter and take a nap. 

_Tap, tap._ That definitely wasn't his mother. Euphemia would've just walked in by now. James glanced around the room, spotting an unfamiliar tawny owl at his window. 

"Er, hello," he said to the owl as he opened the window. "D'you have something for me?" The owl stuck out its leg. There was no name on the parcel that James could see as he untied it. He turned back towards the owl for a closer look, only to see that it was already flying away. Curiously, he unfurled the strange looking parchment. 

_James,_  
As a late Christmas gift, I've decided that you finally get to know my middle name. You lot were right months ago when you guessed Elizabeth, though I'll have you know that it's not a boring name in the slightest. Mum was inspired by her favorite book, if you must know.  
Say hello to Sirius for me. I'm sure he's with you as always and that the two of you are too busy playing Quidditch and planning pranks to even think of looking at the ridiculous amount of homework the professors have set. Please just remember that whatever you're plotting against the Slytherins (let's be honest, that's definitely what you're doing) should happen while Remus and I are NOT the prefects on duty. I prefer to feign ignorance to these sorts of things.  
See you on the train,  
Lily Elizabeth Evans 

James ripped open the attached package to see the book, _Pride and Prejudice._ He was fairly certain that Moony's mum read this. She was a Muggle, after all. She probably had loads in common with Lily's mum. He could just picture Lily, standing in front of a bunch of books like the ones at Remus' house. Her bedroom probably had loads of those still photographs. 

_Stop thinking about her bedroom, you prat,_ James scolded himself. _She isn't interested._

He could clearly remember Lily laughing and dancing with Gideon at the wedding last weekend. Sure, she'd danced with James as well but that was only because they were friends. She'd obviously only done it to pass the time until Gideon were free. James looked over at the letter he'd received yesterday. Lily may not be interested but Julia Hawthorne surely was. She was a very nice girl and quite intelligent. Perhaps Sirius was right. He should just move on and think of someone other than Lily. Making up his mind, James picked up a quill and began to write a reply to Julia.


	15. Chapter 14: Back to Hogwarts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra bonus surprise chapter! Expect another chapter on Tuesday and please leave comments of any thoughts that you have.

Lily took a few deep breaths before getting onto the Hogwarts Express. The last time she'd ridden the train to Hogwarts, James had bought her chocolate frogs. This time, she was merely trying not to dwell on the fact that he'd never responded to her letter. She'd been sure of a response and yet days had passed with no answer. Maybe James had never received her letter?

 _Or maybe he just didn't want to speak with you. Made that pretty bloody clear at the wedding, didn't he?_ Lily tried to fight the blush she felt appearing on her cheeks. James was her friend. If he'd rather spend an evening chatting with Julia Hawthorne than dancing with Lily, what business was it of hers? She hadn't even been that close with him until last term. Determinedly, Lily set out in search of her friends with the intention to discuss anything other than James Potter. 

Of course, this intention lasted about five minutes after Lily joined her dormitory mates. 

"I need to know _everything_ about the Longbottom wedding," Mary demanded. "Neither of you were detailed enough in your letters." It was an innocuous enough start. Mary had always been immensely fascinated by the wizarding world and its culture. "Tell me enough that I can imagine myself in attendance."

"There really isn't that much to tell," Kiara shrugged. "Alice wore white dress robes. She and Frank said vows. Everyone danced. The end."

"When you marry Otis and I cover it for the society section, I'll make sure to write just like that," Mary rolled her eyes. "There were vows and dancing. You sound so boring! Did they use traditional vows or write their own? Can you describe Alice's dress robes? What was the cake like? Who danced with whom?"

"Whom?" Dorcas scoffed. "You sound bloody pretentious." Like Mary, Dorcas had not secured an invitation to Frank and Alice's nuptials. Unlike Mary, Dorcas was not content with minor details. She preferred to pretend she was above such things in an attempt to hide her insecurities. If she'd learned nothing else in her six years at Hogwarts, Lily Evans had learned to read Dorcas Meadowes like a book. At the current moment, the book read that Dorcas did not feel up to discussing events she hadn't been invited to. 

"If you're wanting to know who people danced with, Lily here was looking mighty cozy with Potter," Kiara responded, deciding that the best course of action would be to answer one of Mary's questions and to ignore Dorcas' comments altogether. 

"I also danced with Fab and Gid quite a bit," Lily shot a glare in her friend's direction. 

"That's not as interesting," Mary waved a hand. "How was dancing with Potter?"

"It was, er, fine, I guess," Lily stammered, feeling another blush creep across her cheeks. 

_It was bloody wonderful,_ she answered internally, knowing that she could never say such a thing aloud. 

"Fine?" repeated Kiara. "You were with him most of the evening."

"And then he ran off to spend the rest of the evening with Julia Hawthorne. Honestly, it's not that big of a deal."

"Oh, please," said Mary. "You two would be adorable together." 

"And who were you with all of hols?" Dorcas interrupted. "You didn't mention it in your letters."

Lily slumped in her seat as Dorcas steered the conversation away from the wedding and onto Mary's exploits with some Muggle university student. Surely, things would be better once she just talked to James. He'd probably make some joke about the book and all would be normal again. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All Remus wanted was some peace and quiet. If he'd realized how loud things would be around his own mates, he'd have sat for breakfast with the Prewett twins instead. Instead, he was stuck making incessant small talk with Julia Hawthorne. 

If Remus were honest with himself, he would admit that Julia really wasn't that bad. She'd wisely seemed to deduce that getting along with James' mates would greatly improve her relationship and seemed to be making a concentrated effort to get to know them. She obviously fancied James quite a bit and was using her Ravenclaw study skills to learn all about Remus and Peter, who'd come down to breakfast without their dorm mates. 

"Morning," Lily smiled, tearing Remus from his contemplation as she slid onto the bench across from him. She shot a curious look at the Ravenclaw beside her but did not seem compelled to share her thoughts. 

"Good morning, Lily!" Julia greeted brightly. "Your hair looks nice today."

"Er, thank you," Remus bit his cheek to stop from laughing at the confused look on his friend's face. "Mary gave it a trim last night."

"She did very well," Julia nodded as Lily took slow bites of her eggs. "Did you have a nice holiday?"

"Yes, thank you. How was yours?" Remus sniggered into his pumpkin juice at the tone of Lily's voice. Six years of sharing a table had taught most of the Gryffindors that she preferred not to be bothered until she'd had time to wake up fully. Ravenclaws, it seemed, had not been taught such a valuable survival skill. 

"Oh, it was just lovely!" Julia gushed loudly, blissfully ignorant of her companion tightening her grip on her fork. "I love spending time with my family. And with Alice's wedding, all of the family was in town. Of course, you were at the wedding, weren't you?"

"Yes, it was brilliant."

"It certainly was. And it gave me and James a chance to chat. Maybe I should send a thank you note to Alice and Frank instead of the other way around!"

"Why?" Lily asked sharply. Remus could've sworn that her brow had furrowed at the mention of James' name, though he couldn't think of why that would happen. 

"Why, James and I are dating now!" Julia exclaimed in a way that made Remus think this was the purpose of her entire exchange with Lily. "He wrote me a few days after the wedding to ask me!" At that, Lily stopped short. 

"He wrote you?"

"Well, yes he-"

"He sent you an owl."

"Yes, it was incredibly romantic-"

"Right," his friend cut off the Ravenclaw yet again and began to stand. "That reminds me, er, I actually have a letter to send as well. To my mum. Left some things at home, you see."

"Oh, of course!" Julia waved her off. She obviously didn't know Lily well enough to see how flustered she'd become. "I'll see you later." 

"Right, er, bye."

Curiously, Remus watched as his friend walked quickly out of the Great Hall. He was not sure what was going on with her but obviously something had bothered her. 

"Why's Lily so weird about a letter?" Peter mumbled beside him, taking advantage of Julia's momentary distraction in the form of James entering there room. 

"That's the million galleon question, Wormtail."


	16. Chapter 15: Magical Maintenance

Friday, January 21, 1977  
Minister Minchum Attacked in Office  
Terror struck the Ministry of Magic Thursday as Minister Minchum entered his office to find himself immediately under attack. Kristof Rowle, a member of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement presumed to be under the Imperius Curse, was found waiting in Minister's office. Rowle shot multiple Killing Curses at the Minister, though quick work from Auror Alastor Moody subdued Rowle and he is currently awaiting a hearing from the Wizengamot. Also found in the Minister's office was the body of Magical Maintenance employee Byron Pettigrew. It is presumed that Pettigrew was struck down by Rowle upon arriving to check the atmosphere spells in Minister Minchum's office. Pettigrew is survived by his wife Joseline and one son, Peter, who is currently in his sixth year at Hogwarts. 

 

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Sometimes Sirius wondered what it'd be like, to be close with your parents. Abnormally close to the Potters as he was, he couldn't help but pity Peter as he watched his friend slump listlessly into his seat for dinner. Sirius, James, and Remus had found him lying in bed, staring wordlessly at the ceiling on Thursday afternoon and had not seen Peter leave the dormitory since this morning for class. Remus said it was best not to remark on it, to simply treat Peter as if it were any other Monday until he mentioned things himself. Remus tended to know what to do in situations where no one else did, so Sirius was following his friend's lead and trying to think of other topics of conversation. 

"Y'know, Evans' birthday is up next," he prodded James, though he was sure his friend already knew this. 

"Alright?" the git raised an eyebrow as if Evans' birthday didn't affect him in the least. 

"So what are we doing to celebrate?" 

"I'm sure the girls will figure something out. Or the Prewetts will put an idea together."

Remus rolled his eyes at James' response but was saved a retort by Julia's arrival at the Gryffindor table. The bird had an annoying habit of popping up when she wasn't wanted, though if Sirius were being honest, she was rarely wanted. 

"Get lost on your way to the Ravenclaw table, Hawthorne?" Really, couldn't they just head off to a broom cupboard later? Sirius wasn't sure he and Remus would be able to distract Wormtail on their own. 

"Oh, Siri, you're so funny!" she trilled, oblivious to the fact that he was being serious. Down the table, he could've sworn he heard Evans snort. 

"That's our Sirius," James agreed quickly, kicking him under the table. "Always good for a laugh. How was Divination?"

"Oh, brilliant," Hawthorne sighed, preparing herself a plate despite the fact that she wasn't at her House's table. "Professor Esmeralda is a visionary."

"It isn't odd for you, calling the professor by her first name?" Remus asked. Like the rest of the sixth-year Gryffindors, he'd never had any patience for Divination or the airy professor who taught it. 

"Oh, no," replied Julia. "Professor Esmeralda wants us to feel free to express ourselves and connect with the Inner Eye." Sirius could almost feel Remus' outer eyes rolling from the seat beside him. 

"Right," he stood from the table before the Ravenclaw could elaborate further. "Well, I'm full. Think I'll head up to the Tower." 

"I'll join you," Peter's eyes darted to the couple at the table as he stood, Remus following quickly. 

"I'll see you later," Prongs told his girlfriend, beginning to stand as well. 

"But Jamie, I thought we could revise together," Hawthorne pouted. Sirius bit his tongue to keep from reminding the girl what her boyfriend's name was. 

"Er," _Jamie_ ran a hand through his hair as his eyes swept over Peter. "I think the lads were planning on us all palling around tonight."

"But you have Quidditch practice tomorrow. I was hoping to spend some time with you," the bird was now rubbing the back of James' neck in circles. "But if you don't want to be around me..."

"We'll see you later, Prongs," Sirius interrupted, not caring to see how to rest of this conversation would proceed. This was one of many reasons he didn't stick with the same bird after a few snogs. Peter in bloody mourning and all Hawthorne cared about was her damn alone time. Couldn't she see that James was needed elsewhere? Disgustedly, Sirius stomped out of the Great Hall. He'd only made it a few steps before catching sight of a familiar looking bat whispering in the corridor. 

"Oi, Snivellus!" It was perfect timing, really. Peter usually enjoyed pranks and Sirius could use a nice outlet for his frustrations. 

"Think of something a bit more creative, won't you?" snarled Snape. "I'm sure that if you ask politely, Potter will let you use that brain cell the two of you share."

"I'll do you one better," smirked Sirius, though Remus pushed his hand away before he was even able to raise his wand fully. Looking incredulously toward his friend, he saw Moody shake his head quickly. 

"Come on, Padfoot," he hissed. "Let's just go." Sirius was surprised but wasn't going to question his friend in front of Snape. Surely, Remus must know something that he didn't. 

"Interesting that you'll take orders from a half-blood," Snivellus' companion stepped into view. "Mother will be revolted." Sirius quickly realized what Remus had known that he hadn't. 

"Step off it, Regulus," he stepped angrily in front of his mates. "Looks to me like I could say the same about you. You know as well as I do that the name Snape is nowhere to be found in _Nature's Nobility_." 

"At least Severus isn't a dirty mudblood-lover like you."

"And at least I know how to wash my hair." Snape and Regulus merely rolled their eyes as they pushed past to the Great Hall. 

"Lucky for you that your mates are around, right Pettigrew?" the overgrown bat called from down the corridor. "I heard your father didn't have anyone to do all of his fighting for him."

 _Bang._

Snape fell to the floor and began sprouting boils all over his face, Regulus joining him before Sirius truly processed what was going on. Looking wildly around, his eyes landed on Remus, deep scowl in place and wand pointed at the two Slytherins. Peter stood behind him, shaking. Sirius could not recall a time he'd seen Wormtail so shaken. 

"Shut your bloody traps, yeah?" Moony snarled. "Or next time the boils will be located someplace a tad less visible." He swept quickly away, Sirius and Peter hurrying behind him and leaving the Slytherins prone on the ground to seethe.


	17. Chapter 16: Happy Birthday, Miss Evans

Lily shouldn't have been crying. The more she thought about it, the more ridiculous she felt for spending part of her afternoon crying in a broom cupboard. She hadn't been friends with Sev since the end of fifth year, had flatly refused his apology over the summer, and had no right to be upset with him for not wishing her a happy birthday. Honestly, there had no reason to expect him to even remember. 

She shouldn't have expected Petunia to care either. They hadn't really been close at all since second year, of course Tuney would just add her name to the card from Mum. Even if they did typically still give each other their own individual presents, Tuney was very busy. Lily especially shouldn't be upset at the very nice jumpers she'd received. Really, they were lovely. She shouldn't be upset that her family hadn't remembered that witches came of age at seventeen or that the typical birthday gift for a seventeen-year-old witch was a locket. 

_Dad would've remembered._ Lily grumbled to herself, making it that much more difficult to gain control of her emotions. She'd need to hurry up and get to the lavatory to wash her face before her mates found her. That's why she'd chosen a broom cupboard in the first place, after all. Everyone would know to search for Lily Evans in the loo or the Potions classrooms or the kitchens. No one needed to know that she was crying on her birthday and this broom cupboard was a perfect location where no one would find her. 

"What're you doing in here, Evans?" She was proven wrong as a familiar mop of dark hair joined her in the cupboard. 

"I could ask you the same question," Lily scoffed, attempting to discreetly wipe her face. 

"What's wrong?" James' eyes met hers at once, filled with so much concern that her stomach did a small somersault. 

"Nothing's wrong."

"Oh really? You're just spending your seventeenth crying in a broom cupboard over nothing. Dorcas is fit to call in the Aurors if you aren't found soon, just so you know."

"Dorcas overreacts."

"Because you were so safe the last time no one could find you," James raised an eyebrow. "It's your birthday. Your mates want to celebrate with you. What's got you so upset?" 

"It's stupid," Lily crossed her arms, unable to stop a few fresh tears from falling. "Honestly, I've already had a party. Slughorn awarded Gryffindor extra points this morning just because of my birthday, you lot turned everyone's hair red at lunch to match mine, my mum sent me some lovely jumpers-"

"Jumpers? For your seventeenth?" At his words, Lily fell apart again. She managed to tell James all of it between sobs - the way that her mum couldn't seem to ever remember wizarding traditions, the way she missed her dad, the way that Tuney treated her, the way Sev had let her down. She told him things she'd barely discussed with Dorcas, not stopping until there didn't seem to be any tears left in her body. She became dully aware of his arms around her, though she couldn't quite place when he'd started hugging her. Lily stood there for a few more minutes, feeling utterly safe, before she began to be embarrassed over the spectacle she'd just made of herself. 

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, moving back to give him some space though his hands remained on her back. "I probably sound like a spoiled idiot, complaining about these things."

"You're not an idiot, Lily," James tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. She swore they could hear her heart beating across the castle as she was overwhelmed with the urge to snog him. 

James suddenly jumped back, causing Lily to worry that she'd shared her urge aloud. "I almost forgot, I have your gift," he ruffled his hair a few times while opening his rucksack. 

"You already gave me that package from Honeyduke's. It'll take me all term to finish that."

"This is better," he stood with a package behind his back, looking a mixture of proud and nervous. "This is kind of a Christmas gift. Or well, I saw it over Christmas hols and I knew you'd like it so I bought it but Christmas itself was over..."

"You didn't have to-" Lily found herself cut off by James depositing a book into her hand. She ran one awestruck hand over the cover. The book looked nearly identical to her copy of Pride and Prejudice, though a great deal older. 

"It's one of the copies from 1813," James blurted. "Mum has a thing for muggle antique shops and I went with her one day and I saw this and I thought of your letter so I thought you might like it but then Christmas had already passed so I was going to give it to you once term started but I really haven't seen you that much..."

"You got my letter?"

"Of course I did, owl post is fairly reliable. Took me a while to finish the book though, I get so distracted sometimes. Remus and Peter were over a good bit."

"And you were spending time with Julia," Lily prodded. 

"Right," James agreed, looking uncomfortable as he did so. 

"Does she know where you are?" Lily asked. "Might come across a bit awkwardly, us in a broom cupboard together."

"Er, yeah," she noticed that James' cheeks with beginning to hint at red. "We should probably get out of here. If you're alright, I mean."

"I think I'll be okay," Lily smiled, thinking for the first time that afternoon that she really would be. 

Lily did not feel the urge to cry again in the next few days, though she did find herself fighting the urge to blush when she made eye contact with James. She'd known there was some sort of sensitivity in him, there had to be from the way he treated his mates. Knowing and experiencing were two very different things, however, and Lily still wasn't sure how to reconcile the sweet bloke who visited her in the Hospital Wing and bought her antique books with the boy who hexed Slytherins and could never back down from a fight. 

There was no doubt about it, James Potter was kind. She finally found herself admitting this when she watched him helping Remus into their NEWT Charms class. To anyone not paying close attention, it would look as if James merely had his arm around his friend's shoulders. To someone like Lily paying much more attention than she should, it was evident that James was guiding his friend, though Remus seemed to be rolling his eyes at the gesture. Mentally checking the date, Lily was glad she'd made some more muscle relaxing potion. Remus should need it Friday. Lily was sure that James, Sirius, and Peter all knew of Remus' condition, though she wouldn't risk mentioning it to them. She still needed to figure out how to get the potion to Remus without anyone else accidentally drinking it. Mary had been a close call in December. 

Engrossed as she was in her scheming, Lily missed most of Professor Flitwick's lecture and barely registered being dismissed until her classmates began filing out. Trying to play it off, Lily quickly joined the queue to get to the door. Directly in front of her, Remus had nearly reached his mates when he tripped out of nowhere and fell into a desk. 

"I'm fine," Remus waved Sirius and James off as his nose started bleeding profusely. "Really. It's alright. Must've forgotten how to walk for a moment there." Concerned as they were for their friend, Lily wasn't sure that the boys noticed Severus smirking and putting his wand back in his pocket. 

"I'm not sure that's what happened, Remus," she muttered darkly as she glared at Sev. Honestly, Remus was obviously ill! He hadn't even done anything to warrant being hexed. 

"It's _fine,_ " Remus argued as he put a hand on both James' and Sirius' chests to prevent them from following Severus. "I just want to go down to lunch, alright?" Grimly, James nodded as Sirius healed Remus' nose. With Peter, the boys stomped away from the Charms classroom.


	18. Chapter 17: A Sirius Mistake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that this deviates from canon somewhat because Sirius was supposed to be 16 when this incident happened, meaning end of fifth or beginning of sixth year. It fit better here in my timeline so we're going to forget that detail.

Severus glanced repeatedly around at his surroundings, searching for any professors or prefects who may prevent him from reaching his destination. There was no time to delay; he wanted to be sure to catch the Gryffindors in their ridiculous scheme before they found a way to hide the evidence yet again. Normally, Severus would never take the word of someone at face value. He'd have simply dismissed Black's words as another ploy to make Slytherin House look like fools. This time, however, he was sure that he would finally be able to solve the mystery of Lupin's frequent disappearances. The worried look that had flashed in Black's eyes, if only for a moment, had told Severus all that he needed to know. The idiot had let some sort of confidential information slip, information that seemed too good not to act on. 

With this in mind, Severus glided across the grounds toward the Whomping Willow. It was a most curious tree, one that the Carrow twins had said was planted the summer after their first year. Wild as it may seem, Severus was sure his information was accurate. Surely it could not be coincidence that an odd tree was planted the summer before his first year, the summer before Lupin's first year, and that the tree just happened to be mentioned in Black's tirade. Severus smirked as he looked again at the full moon in the sky. He'd long ago notice a pattern between the lunar cycles and Lupin's illnesses or disappearances, though Lily had always deemed him mad. As soon as Lupin was exposed, surely Lily would rebuke the whole lot of Gryffindors and rekindle her friendship with Severus instead. She'd have no choice but to see reason when faced with hard evidence. He imagined her apology as he levitated a branch to the knot in the Willow's trunk. 

Though he was sure that this tree held Lupin's secrets, Severus was a bit surprised when its branches jerked to a stop. It seems he had underestimated Black again by not trusting all of his information. The fact that the Gryffindor knew how to stop the tree from moving further cemented Lupin's guilt in Severus' mind. This must be some sort of secret hideout for simpletons. Severus hurried quickly into the hole at the tree's base, whispering a quick _Lumos_ so that he could see. He could distinctly hear some sort of groaning from the other end of the tunnel, though another muffled sound was coming from the opposite direction. 

"Snape!" Severus wondered what had taken Potter so long; he was typically much quicker to find some sort of alibi. He heard the branches freeze again as footsteps came closer and Potter's voice bellowed yet again for all to hear. "Snape, stop!"

If there was one thing Severus Snape would never do, it would be to take direction from the likes of James Potter. He hurried down the tunnel towards the moaning noises, the noises that had to be coming from Lupin. 

"Snape! You've got to come back! You'll get yourself killed, you great git!" Severus rolled his eyes, marveling at Potter's persistence. His insults were only fueling the Slytherin's desire to face the source of these noises himself. Without a moment's hesitation, Severus ripped the door open. 

The door seemed to open to some sort of living room. A battered couch and broken table lay strewn across the floor, though Severus quickly deduced the cause of the destruction. Standing before him was a lean and tall muscular creature with sandy hair, the exact same sandy hair as that which belonged to Remus Lupin. 

"I knew it," Severus whispered. 

Without warning, the beast turned and locked it's big brown eyes on him. It let out one high-pitched howl before launching itself at him. 

" _Impedimenta!_ " The beast did not even slow. " _Diffindo!_ " Severus was knocked off his feet, though not by the monster. 

"Are - you - bloody - MENTAL?!" James Potter bellowed from his position where he'd landed upon tackling Severus. "What part of 'stop, you'll get yourself killed' was unclear to you?"

"I've got you this time, Potter. I'd like to see you attempt to get away with this."

"That's if we even get out of here, you batty arsehole."

Severus was unable to retort when pain shot through his leg. He looked down quickly to see the beast's claw marks across his calf. With a look of extreme concern (for the beast, of course, not for the injured party), Potter grabbed Severus around the middle and began pulling him back toward the tunnel. As much as they loathed one another, the two boys seemed to agree to focus their efforts primarily on escape. They'd nearly made it through the entrance when Severus felt his head hit the rock wall and everything went black. 

 

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"Are you sure you don't mind?" Alice Fawcett- _Longbottom,_ Lily reminded herself- asked for what must have been the fortieth time. "I feel bad, asking you to do patrols alone." 

"It's alright, Alice, honestly," Lily answered for what was definitely at least the thirtieth time. "There's really just the bottom two floors left. I'll be fine." 

"You're sure?" the seventh-year prodded. "Absolutely sure?"

"Yes!" Lily cried. "Go enjoy your husband."

"Oh, you are just an angel, Lily! I thought it would be fine when McGonagall explained that we wouldn't be sharing a dorm even once we were married. I mean, we've been in separate dorms this long haven't we? But I'm going bloody insane. And then I try to be romantic and surprise Frank and totally forget that the thoughtful git offered to take patrols since Remus is sick. I swear I'm awful at this whole married business."

"Oi!" cried Frank, giving up his previous pretense of studying a suit of armor and definitely not eavesdropping on the two girls. "That's the love of my life you're talking about!"

"Go!" Lily laughed. "Enjoy your surprise already!" 

"Thank you!! I will repay you somehow! Oh, and you may want to avoid the prefect's bathroom tonight," Alice winked before grabbing her husband's hand and hurrying away, causing Lily to laugh even more. She hadn't seen Alice smile nearly enough since her parents' deaths, though Frank seemed to be on a mission to change that. 

Lily certainly wasn't going to begrudge the couple for leaving her alone when rounds would be over in less than half an hour. Everyone needed things to smile about as the blood rights movement gained more traction and became more violent. The Daily Prophet reported new deaths and attacks every day. If finishing her rounds alone would allow two people as kind as Frank and Alice to forget all of that death and destruction, she had no problems finishing her rounds alone. Things were pretty quiet for a Friday night. They hadn't even needed to stop that many couples from snogging. By the time she reached the first floor, in fact, Lily wasn't focusing on her rounds at all. She instead began daydreaming about eating some of her Honeyduke's dark chocolate and rereading another chapter of her book before going to sleep, though that inevitably made her think of the person who'd given her both of those things. 

"Oh, Merlin," James' voice even filled her mind. Though if she were being honest with herself, Lily would prefer not to think of him speaking in such an anxious tone. 

"Potter!" Madam Pompfrey's voice joined James' now. "Lay him on this stretcher here."

 _Stretcher?_ thought Lily. She rounded the corner to see James, Madam Pompfrey, and Peter Pettigrew all crowded around a stretcher which seemed to hold another student. Lily watched intently as the group moved brusquely in the direction of the Hospital Wing, taking care to remain a bit behind and out of sight. 

"How bad was it?" Peter asked. "Madam Pompfrey and I were going to come fetch you two."

"It was bloody awful," James ran a hand through his hair. "Moony- I don't- I just don't know what else to do."

"We can't help him until the morning," said Peter. "Dumbledore will likely be down there as soon as he transforms back and this is enough trouble without adding that on." James nodded, causing Lily to worry all the more. What could the boys possibly be in such trouble for? Was Remus okay? Where was Sirius, could it be him on the stretcher? She leaned around a suit of armor to check, gasping audibly when she realized who was being treated. Severus lay seemingly unconscious, blood dripping from his head and leg. This night was becoming even more confusing. Had he gotten into a fight with James? What did Remus have to do with it all?

"James!" Sirius did not even glance her way as he ran past to his mates. "Is Remus- should I go help-?"

"No," James interrupted darkly. "You should not 'help' anyone. You should've helped someone earlier by keeping your bloody mouth shut."

"I thought-"

"You thought? That's fucking news to me. Remus could have _killed_ Snape tonight, don't you get that? Can you think for one second how he's going to react when he finds out tomorrow? What if they expel him? What if the bloody Ministry gets involved?"

Lily watched in amazement as he stomped away towards the Hospital Wing with Peter following close behind and without giving Sirius a chance to explain. She had never seen the two boys argue past a shove and a few laughs, had never even seen James that angry. The boys seemed to solve all their problems by hexing and shouting. Sirius would've typically responded by shouting back at James or going after him, yet here he was watching his friends go. 

_Oh, Sirius. What did you do?_


	19. Chapter 18: The Morning After

Remus prided himself on being detail-oriented, able to understand nuances that others might not. It was this trait that helped him keep up in his courses, despite missing so many days. It was also this trait that helped to get his friends out of trouble by finding loopholes that others might not ever notice. Yet as Remus looked around, he could not figure out what was bloody happening. 

Typically, whenever one of those damned full moons came around, Remus would walk down to the Whomping Willow with Madam Pomfrey, he'd spend some time with his mates' animal alter-egos, and the boys would leave just before sunrise so that he could transform in peace and wait for the nurse to return and walk with him back to the Hospital Wing to heal anything that needed it and swallow some Pepper-Up Potion. This time, however, something was obviously wrong. 

Remus found himself waking up in the Hospital Wing, when he should have awaken in the shack. He was much more sore than usual, although that wasn't too big of a deal. Remus was used to stiffness and soreness, he could easily handle an injury. The most worrisome part of his current situation came from the sight beside his bed. James was spread across an armchair, glasses askew, while Peter seemed to have transfigured his own chair into a cot. His mates hadn't come down to the Hospital Wing since they'd first learned of his condition, what could they possibly be doing here now?

"Prongs," he hissed, as Peter was usually the hardest to wake up. "James, wake up." There was another reason for concern- James couldn't sleep through the drop of a quill. He had to be exhausted not to hear Remus now. Sighing, he stretched across the bed to reach Prongs and shake his shoulders. 

"Waz-gon-on?!" James cried, jumping from the chair with his wand raised and knocking Remus halfway off the bed in the process. 

"That's what I was going to ask you," Remus grumbled into the side of the sheets.

"Shit, Moony! Sorry!" James righted his friend abruptly and not at all gently. "How're you feeling?"

"Like there's something you're not telling me," Remus raised an eyebrow when Prongs started running his hand through his hair. Whatever had happened must be bad for James to be so nervous. "What are you two doing here? For that matter, what am I doing waking up here instead of the Hospital Wing?"

"Potter!" screeched Madam Pomfrey as she wrenched open the curtains surrounding the boys. "I do believe that I gave you very specific instructions about staying here." 

"Sorry, Madam Pomfrey," he mumbled as he mussed his hair further. 

"You should've notified me as soon as Mr. Lupin was awake. I need to do some testing to ensure that he's healthy," she waved her wand above the patient dismissively. 

"Er, Madam Pomfrey?" asked Remus cautiously. 

"Don't you worry dear," the matron interrupted as she began to pull potions from her apron pocket. "Mr. Snape is just fine. I've given him a Sleeping Draught until Professor Dumbledore speaks with him, although I'm sure he'll want to speak with you first. Everything will be alright. Take this Blood Replenishing Potion for now and apply this green salve to your scratches. Perhaps Mr. Potter could make himself useful and assist in that."

Remus gaped at the nurse as she swept away. What did she mean - Snape was okay? Why wouldn't he be okay? She'd said that Dumbledore would want to speak with him and that he'd need Blood Replenishing Potion, something he hadn't needed since before fifth year... The answer dawning on him, he leaned over the side of the bed and retched. 

"You alright, Moony?" asked Peter, sitting up on his transfigured cot. 

"Of course he's not alright, you dolt," James snapped as he vanished the mess. "D'you normally vomit when you're alright?"

"I want to know what the hell happened last night," Remus interrupted. It had to be bad if James was angry enough to take it out on people. "Did I hurt Snape? Where's Sirius?"

 

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Sirius was in deep shit, there was no way around it. He reckoned he deserved it, doing what he had. What had he been thinking?

"Mr. Black," Professor Dumbledore's face cut through the absolute mess going on in his head. "You understand that multiple students were endangered last night."

"Yes, sir," Sirius didn't even bother to correct the headmaster's use of the name Black. He'd certainly acted like his family last night. 

"And yet you're here to tell me that you are responsible?"

"Yes, sir. Remus had no idea that Snape was coming. I was the one who told him."

"And just how," Dumbledore pushed his glasses a bit higher on his nose, "did you know what to tell Mr. Snape?"

"We've known about the lycanthropy since first year. I convinced Remus a while back to tell us how he got in the Shack."

"You've been in the Shrieking Shack?"

"No, sir," lied Sirius quickly. "Remus would never allow that. He appreciates being here too much, wouldn't want to break your trust." That much was true at least. 

"I see," said Dumbledore, giving nothing away with his expression. "But you had no such problem." 

_Tears are messy and unbecoming._ He could hear his mother's voice clearly as he swiped at his suddenly damp eyes. _You do not show weakness._

"It's not like I planned it," Sirius spat. Snape just got under his skin the way that few others did- recruiting Reg to join that Knights of Walpurgis bullshit, making digs about Pete's dad, breaking Moony's nose. It wasn't right, Snivellus being seen as deserving of more rights than Remus for something he couldn't even control. And after the things he'd said...

"Professor!" called James as he burst into the Headmaster's office and interrupted Sirius' thoughts. 

"Good morning, Mr. Potter," greeted Dumbledore as if he'd been expecting as much. "Toffee?"

"Er, no thank you," James ran a hand through his hand as he stared determinedly at anything other than Sirius. "I need to speak with you, Professor." Would Prongs really go to Dumbledore to rat him out? He deserved it, of course, and had already told the headmaster everything. It wasn't the trouble Sirius was worried about but James' loyalty that was concerning. The James he knew would never tell on a mate. Were they even mates any more?

"Of course," said Dumbledore. "Mr. Black, I will be speaking with you soon."

"Yes, sir," Sirius agreed. He stiffened as he walked past his mate, his brother, who still did not acknowledge his presence. 

"Please sit down, Mr. Potter," the headmaster waved a hand at the seat Sirius had just vacated and popped a toffee into his mouth. 

"You can't expel Remus," James blurted. He hadn't meant to lead with that but the suspense of watching the Headmaster eating candy when things were so precarious pushed him over the edge. 

"Excuse me?" 

"You just can't! None of this was his fault. Snape wasn't supposed to be there and he still wasn't badly hurt. Remus is much more hurt than he is and he'd never want to injure anyone, you have to know that he wouldn't. He deserves to be at this school as much as anyone - maybe more than anyone, he definitely spends more time on his homework than I do. It's going to be hard enough for him to get a job when we graduate, even if he won't talk about it, and there's no telling what the Ministry will do if they find out what happened, you know how they've been lately, they probably won't even listen about it being an accident-"

"Mr. Potter," Dumbledore raised a hand. "I assure you, I have no intentions of expelling Remus Lupin."

"Er, you don't?" James ran a hand through his hair as he sank back into his seat, having risen at some point during his speech. 

"Certainly not," the headmaster placated. "Although I'm sure there are many who would disagree with that decision, should they discover what happened last night."

"I won't tell anyone. Neither will Peter or Remus. And if Sirius-"

"I am certain that Sirius will understand the sensitive nature of that information."

"Right," James' eyes darkened. Until yesterday, he'd been certain of Sirius too. Now how was he supposed to feel?

"I understand that you had a hand in last night's events as well." 

"Sir?" James was confused. Surely Sirius hadn't tried to blame him?

"Madam Pomfrey tells me that you helped to bring Severus Snape back to the castle."

"Oh. Yes, sir."

"I am curious to know how you accomplished that."

"Er," James ran yet another hand through his hair. He couldn't tell the headmaster about Prongs. It'd only get Remus into more trouble, not to mention Sirius. "I don't know, sir. I guess that Remus just recognized me."

"Recognized you?" Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. James cursed inwardly, there was no way he'd believed that tosh. 

"Er, yes." There was no point in backing down now. "Maybe he could smell me or something so he didn't attack me." 

"Werewolves do have heightened senses of smell," nodded Dumbledore, though James was sure he was suspicious. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Right," James breathed a sigh of relief at the change in questioning. "Well, er, Peter and I were in our dormitory. And then Sirius came in, and we had expected him earlier, y'know, so we asked where he'd been. And he said he'd run into Snape, that he'd let slip to Snape how to get to Remus-"

"And he did this on purpose?" Dumbledore pressed. 

"No, sir," replied James, though that was certainly no excuse. "No, he definitely didn't plan it or anything. But I went to go stop it. I yelled at Snape but I don't know, he didn't hear me or something, so I had to go after him. He attacked Remus first, professor. He was sending slicing hexes at him and you know Remus couldn't understand what was going on-Madam Pomfrey's been giving him Blood Replenishing Potions. All Snape's got is that scratch on his leg. And his head, Remus didn't do that. He ran into a wall.

 _Well,_ thought James, _he may have had some help tripping. But how else was I supposed to transform into Prongs and get the git out of there with him conscious? It's not as if it hurt him that badly._

"That quite a showing of Gryffindor bravery, Mr. Potter."

"Oh, er," James was sure he was going to start pulling his hair out from messing with it so much. "It wasn't that big of a deal, sir."

"I beg to differ," argued Dumbledore. "You heard that a classmate, one that you do not seem to particularly like, was in danger and faced off a werewolf. That's admirable."

"Remus is my friend, he's not just a werewolf."

"Which is an admirable statement in itself, given the current political climate."

"My dad says you don't need magical blood to be a decent person and that only tossers think that you do."

"I'm quite familiar with your father," Dumbledore smiled. 

"Right." James had nearly forgotten his parents' friendship with the headmaster in his anger. "Er, professor?"

"Yes, James?" 

"What's going to happen to Sirius?"

"I'm not sure," sighed Professor Dumbledore. "Multiple lives were put in danger due to his actions."

"You're not going to expel him, are you?"

"I may have to. I'm sure that Mr. Snape will want to be sure that justice is served." 

"Expelling him won't be justice, sir," James argued. The events of last night had shaken him, surely. He still didn't know what to make of the bloke he'd thought of as his best mate. Yet he knew that expelling him would be wrong. 

"I see," said Professor Dumbledore, telling James nothing of his thoughts. "Well, Mr. Potter, I believe a visit to the Hospital Wing is in order. I suggest that you try to get some sleep, I'm sure you're exhausted."

"Yes, sir," James nodded, he truly hadn't gotten much rest. "Will Remus be able to leave the Hospital Wing today?"

"I believe Madam Pomfrey may keep him until the evening. You'll be able to assist him, I'm sure."

"Thank you, sir," smiled James at Dumbledore's understanding. Now that he knew Moony could remain at Hogwarts, he could feel the exhaustion taking over. Stifling a yawn as he left the headmaster's office, he wondered if he could snag a sandwich from the kitchens before heading to the dormitory for a much needed nap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay- been going through a rough patch. You can still expect an update Tuesday!


	20. Chapter 19: Family Expectations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU to those who left kudos/comments. I really appreciate them!!!

When Sirius was six years old, he did magic for the first time. Reg had broken some antique vase when they were playing and their mother had summoned an old belt to beat him with. Sirius had gotten so angry that he'd blown the windows out of the house and locked the drawing room door so fiercely that Walburga couldn't even get through with an _alohamora_. Most magical children would get some sort of celebration; Sirius got to go to bed early with no dinner as punishment for using his magic against his mother. When he turned eleven, his parents planned a large party for his birthday. Sirius had been ecstatic at having a night all about him, even if he hadn't been allowed any say over the decorations or menu. He'd been allowed to select one thing - the birthday cake, a vivid red velvet with cream cheese icing. Finally, there would be people around to sing to him other than Reg and Kreacher. He looked forward to it for a week, up until the moment that Rodolphus Lestrange had announced his engagement to Sirius' cousin Bella at the end of the meal and all of the adults celebrated with a champagne toast while the cake sat uneaten in the kitchen. When Sirius had been sixteen, his mother had given him a choice - join the Knights of Walburgis, as all respectable pureblood young men were doing, or leave. He chose to leave, arriving at the Potters' bruised and bloody with no possibility of returning to Grimmauld Place. Sirius Black had been through a few crappy situations but this was definitely the worst. 

It had been a week and still none of his mates would speak to him. Sirius had taken to sleeping on the common room couch at night in an attempt to give Remus space, though it didn't seem to help much. Worst of all was that he couldn't even fault his mates for being angry with him. He didn't deserve any of them. He'd tried apologizing to Moony while James was talking to Dumbledore that next morning but Remus asked him to leave before the words could even come out. Sirius was not one topush himself on anyone so he'd taken to being alone - eating alone, studying alone, smoking alone. He was starting to wonder how he'd ever survived Hogwarts without the others. 

_You didn't,_ said a voice that sounded remarkably like his mother. _You've had James since that first train ride to Hogwarts and look how it turned out. He could've been killed trying to clean up your mistakes. They're all better off without you around._ Sighing, Sirius took another drag from his cigarette and stared out the Astronomy Tower window. 

"Still brooding?" Kiara Shacklebolt's voice took him by surprise as she entered the tower, telescope in hand. 

"Brooding?"

"It's what you've been doing all week," she shrugged while setting up the telescope. "I assume it has to do with why you haven't been around any of your mates."

"That's none of your damn business," Sirius glared. 

"Didn't say it was," she shrugged again. Sirius found it very annoying. 

"And what are you doing in the Astronomy Tower on a Friday night, Shacklebolt?"

"Checking my star chart for that essay due Monday."

"Of course you are," he rolled his eyes. "Typical Shacklebolt, got to be perfect if daddy's going to be Minister one day."

"Some of us actually like our families," Kiara snapped, angrier than Sirius was used to seeing her. 

"Alright, alright," he put his hands up in surrender. "Sorry. I didn't mean to be insulting. Seems I've been a typical Black lately is all."

"You have not." Now it was Kiara's turn to roll her eyes as she abandoned her work to take a seat beside him. "If you were a typical Black, I wouldn't have bothered speaking to you."

"It's okay that they influence you, you know," she continued when he didn't respond. "They're your family. It's going to have some sort of impact."

"I don't want to be anything like them."

"Of course you don't," Kiara agreed. "You and I are actually pretty alike, you know."

"How is that?" Sirius scoffed. "We couldn't be any different. You study all the damn time and work yourself to the bone. I still don't understand how you weren't made prefect. 

A frown crossed Kiara's face at the mention of the word 'prefect,' though it passed quickly. "I work so hard to make my family proud. Don't you get it? Everything that I do is to fit my family's ideals. Everything that _you_ do is to oppose your family's ideals. We're two sides of the same coin."

Sirius shrugged again. 

"Yes but your family isn't batshit crazy." 

"You know, I kind of envy you," she gazed out the window. "It's okay for you to make mistakes. No one expects you to be perfect because everyone understands that you didn't have the best role models. If I mess up? There's no excuse. I'm a pureblood witch raised by two loving parents. I just don't want to let them down."

"You're not letting them down, Shacklebolt," Sirius shook his head at the thought. 

"We'll see."

"You could probably even take a Friday night off from schoolwork," he smiled. "No big plans with Bones?"

"I'm spending tomorrow with Otis," Kiara responded, a smile lighting her features as soon as she said her boyfriend's name. "I'm helping Leslee do her braids tonight, just had to wait until she was done flying."

"James has them practicing tonight?" 

Kiara grimaced once she realized she'd mentioned quidditch in front of him. Being kicked off the team had certainly been a blow, though one that Sirius felt he more than deserved. 

"No, no," Kiara replied. "Leslee just likes to practice her speed. Seekers are more independent anyway, I think flying on her own helps more than the team practices."

"You have a point," Sirius conceded, happy to focus on Leslee rather than the team as a whole. "If she's so independent, why's she need you to do her hair?"

"Because box braids take hours," Kiara laughed. "Even with magic, there's no way she'd be able to do it on her own. Speaking of which..." She took hold of his wrist to check the time. "I'd better get going. See you around."

"Yeah..." replied Sirius. "See you."

He continued staring at his wrist as Kiara left, turning the watch around in circles. Mr. and Mrs. Potter had given him the watch just a few months ago for his seventeenth. Mrs. Potter had been so excited to see him wearing it over Christmas hols. Sirius didn't even want to imagine how they'd feel now. The longer he thought on it, the clearer it became. He didn't deserve this watch. Taking a deep breath, he slid the watch off his wrist and into his pocket.


	21. Chapter 20: Lily's Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. This chapter takes place two weeks from the Whomping Willow incident, in case that's not totally clear.   
> 2\. Apparently the British DO have "cookies" and not just "biscuits." Who knew? Not me until I researched.

"Have some cookies," said Lily unceremoniously as she thrust a container of them into James' hands. 

"Er, what?" he looked up at her confusedly from his seat on the common room couch. 

"You look miserable. You've looked miserable for over a week so I baked you some cookies. Now eat them and stop being miserable."

"Alright..." James gingerly placed the latest Puddlemere United catalog on the table and picked up a cookie. 

"Good," Lily sighed and sunk into the couch beside him. 

"You're mental, y'know that?" 

"And you need a cookie," she took one for herself. 

"Why exactly do I need a cookie? Not that I don't appreciate them."

"Because all of this moping of yours is creeping everyone out," Lily replied. "You've been so quiet lately. It just seems wrong. Not to mention that you've barely eaten anything all week."

"How d'you know?" James raised an eyebrow, heart skipping a beat when a blush crossed Lily's features. 

"I was worried about you," she shrugged. "And Remus and Peter. You all just seem so down." 

"I'm sure you could just talk to him," she prodded gently when he didn't respond. "Obviously you miss each other."

"I haven't been moping," James argued. 

"Oh, really?" Lily tried to fight off her annoyance, though she couldn't keep the disdain out of her voice. "Is that why you're sitting all alone in the common room reading that catalog for the third bloody time this week?"

"Now, hold-"

"I get it, whatever Sirius did was obviously awful for you all to be so angry. But it's been two weeks! All you're doing by not speaking to him is punishing yourself."

"You don't know what you're talking about," said James darkly. "Maybe I was wrong about him after all. I thought he was good but what he did - that wasn't good. It's something I'd expect of a bloody death eater, not my best mate."

"People aren't just bad or good, James! They're allowed to make mistakes."

"So what then? I stay his friend and make excuses for him until he finally goes too far? You already tried that once and look where it got you."

Without thinking, Lily reached out and slapped James across the face. She'd been worried about James and obviously couldn't admit that she knew what had happened - admitting that she knew Remus' secret or that she'd been eavesdropping wouldn't have gone over well. But she'd never expected her to respond like this. How dare he throw her failed friendship with Severus in her face that way?

"I can't believe you," she snapped, snatching the container of cookies from his grasp. "You think you know everything, don't you?"

"Me?" he cried astonishedly. "I'm not the one running about telling people how to solve problems that don't concern me! You're the one who thinks you know everything! You can't fix this, Evans!" James called after her as she stomped towards the portrait hole.

"Watch me," she responded darkly, slinging the portrait hole open in the process.

Sirius thought he heard a door slam as he silently put his clothes back on, avoiding eye contact with Priscilla Rowle in a deserted classroom down the corridor. He'd never have thought his first time shagging would be with a pug-faced Slytherin but then again, he'd also never have thought his mates wouldn't be speaking to him. 

_At least the rest of her is fit,_ he appraised as she pulled her skirt back up her legs. 

"We should do this again," she gave him a quick kiss before picking up her school bag and leaving the room. Sirius wondered whether that would actually happen. This was precisely why he'd never gone so far before - no reason to hurt the bird when he moved on. Though Priscilla certainly didn't seemed to care, she'd been the one urging him to go farther. If rumors were true, she was precisely the type of girl who wouldn't mind if Sirius shagged her and chucked her. 

Sighing, he gathered his things and began walking toward Gryffindor Tower. He felt dirty, shagging someone he didn't care about. It had been nice in the moment, being able to push everything else from his mind and focus solely on the physical. Now it was much less nice, just one more example of his selfishness. _The Black ancestors would be proud,_ he thought disgustedly, so entrenched in his reflections that he didn't even notice Lily in the corridor until she walked straight into him. 

"I'm sorry," she said quickly, though her tone seemed more annoyed than anything.

"S'alright," Sirius replied, handing her the bag that she'd dropped. 

"Oh!" Lily cried, reaching into the bag. "I have cookies for you."

"Cookies?"

"Yes," she rolled her eyes. "You're obviously miserable. Have James' as well, that prat certainly deserve them."

"What do you mean?" Sirius asked, now holding two containers of cookies. 

"I made him cookies too - he's as miserable as you are, of course. I tried to talk to him about the whole thing but apparently it 'doesn't concern me' and I 'think I know everything.' I do not think I know what's best for everyone!" Sirius didn't necessarily agree with that - he'd certainly seen Lily pushing plenty of cold remedies on Remus and trying to force Mary to follow study schedules - but he knew better than to argue. 

"Alright, so maybe I like to help people," she continued. "But that'sa positive thing! It's certainly better than being an arrogant toerag who thinks he's always right!" 

"Er..." Sirius was starting to feel very uncomfortable. 

"If you two would just talk about things, everything would be fine," Lily prodded. "I know the boys all miss you as much as you miss them."

"That's not going to work," he argued, wishing they could talk about something else. "They don't need to be saddled with something like me." 

"That's rubbish," Lily rolled her eyes. "No one's saddled with you."

"I dunno," Sirius ran a hand through his hair, the action reminding him of James. "I have been spending Christmas hols at James' the last few years. Maybe it's time that I leave him alone."

"Don't be ridiculous," said Lily. "You're brilliant. Don't let one mistake cause you to forget that."

"Thanks, Li-"

"I'm brilliant!" she cried. 

"Er, what?" asked Sirius. 

"You're don't have anyone to pal around with in Hogsmeade tomorrow, do you?" 

"I was thinking of staying in the castle," he replied, confused by the abrupt change of subject. 

"No! You can't do that. Come with me. It'll be wonderful," Lily gushed, making Sirius very nervous. As much as he enjoyed her company, he certainly didn't think of her that way. He also saw no reason to make James more cross with him than he already was."

"Er..." he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Listen, Evans, it's not that I don't want to go with you. You really are brilliant. I just think of you in more of a friend sort of way."

"Sirius, you dolt," she smacked his arm. "I'm not asking you on a date! Just come as my mate, would you? The girls all have dates anyway and I don't particularly feel like being a third wheel to any of them."

"Oh," he let out a sigh of relief. "Sure thing."

"Brilliant."

"Are you headed back to the Tower? I'll walk with you."

"Oh," it seemed to be Lily's turn to feel awkward. "I have to head to the Owlery actually. Letter to send. Just meet me in the Great Hall at 11am tomorrow morning!"

"Er... right," said Sirius, though Lily barely heard him. She walked quickly to the Owlery, glad that he hadn't insisted on accompanying her. Surely, her plan had to work. Sirius just needed to be reminded of who he was - who he really was.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

"So, where d'you want to go?" Sirius asked awkwardly the next morning as the pair exited their carriage. He caught James sending an annoyed look their way but chose to ignore it, though he did notice Lily checking her watch before answering. 

"Zonko's?" she offered. "I know you love that place."

"But you don't," he pointed out. "Why not Honeyduke's? I know how you are about your chocolate."

"There will be plenty of time for me to - I mean, for us to go there later."

"Right..." Sirius cocked an eyebrow. Since when did Lily Evans turn down sweets? "Three Broomsticks? I could do with a butterbeer."

"Not yet!" Lily cried, causing passerby to stare at them. "Let's just... go to the apothecary. There are some Potions supplies I need to stock up on."

It seemed to Sirius, however, that Lily didn't actually need much of anything. Most of their time in J. Pippin's Potions was spent browsing idly while Lily checked her watch. In fact, she jumped up at 11:45 and announced her desire for a butterbeer without even making a single purchase in the small shop. Sirius had been the mastermind behind enough schemes to know - Lily was definitely up to something. 

"So why exactly did we need to be in the Three Broomsticks at noon?" he asked casually as Madam Rosmerta brought their drinks. 

"Just hoping to run into a friend of mine," she answered airily, eyes darting to the door. 

"If you're just trying to see some bloke you fancy, it's really alright," Sirius said, though a small part of him admitted that he'd be very lonely the rest of the afternoon without her. "You don't have to babysit me, Evans."

"That's definitely not it," she laughed - Sirius noted that it was her real laugh, not her 'pretending not to care' laugh. He was preparing to question his friend further when an all-too-familiar voice called out across the bar.

"Sirius!"

"What is Mr. Potter doing here?" Sirius hissed. Lily had the sense to look abashed. 

"Oh, that's Mr. Potter? What a funny coincidence," she shrugged unconvincingly. "I wonder what he's doing here."

"And you must be Lily!" cried Mr. Potter excitedly, exposing Lily's feeble lie rather quickly. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"You too, Mr. Potter," she avoided Sirius' eye contact while shaking the elderly man's hand. 

" Call me Fleamont," he laughed. "Or Monty. That's what Sirius here calls me - still haven't been able to convince him that Dad works just fine."

"Er, right," Lily glanced nervously between the two. "Well, I'm just going to head to Honeyduke's. You two should catch up. Bye!" She was already out of her chair before saying the last word.

"I expect some chocolate frogs, Evans!" shouted Sirius, eliciting nothing more than a wave from the redhead as she scurried out of the door. 

"Sweet girl," Fleamont sighed as he sunk in the recently vacated chair. "Must be concerned for you to write to someone she hasn't even met and arrange this little chat."

"I don't know what she'd be concerned about. Must be going mental."

"So I'm to assume that Albus Dumbledore is mental as well?" Fleamont raised an eyebrow. "I may be old, son, but I'm not senile yet."

Sirius flinched inwardly at the word 'son', fiddling with his wrist where his watch should be. 

"In fact," Fleamont continued, glancing quickly at Sirius' wrist. "Albus seems to think you still stand a chance of being saved. Of course, Euphemia and I disagree."

"What?" Sirius could feel his stomach dropping to the floor. He shouldn't have had that butterbeer - it was surely going to come back up any minute now. He'd always known he didn't deserve the Potters but to be told as much, and to be told so matter of factly... Sirius felt the watch sitting in his pocket. He hadn't been able to bring himself to leave it in the dormitory but surely he'd have to return it now. 

"Er, right," he was determined not to show how upset he was. "So, er, that's-"

"See, Albus means well," Fleamont continued as if Sirius weren't coming apart right in front of him. "He just has a tendency to see people more as chess pieces than as individuals. It comes in handy, make no mistake about that, but there are times that he overlooks certain things. He looks at you and worries about your upbringing, about what you may become in the future. Euphemia and I? We're not worried a tad about that. You've never had a single dark bone in your body and I find it highly unlikely that one would choose to materialize now."

"But what I did - didn't Dumbledore tell you-?"

"Albus told me nothing and I didn't ask," Mr. Potter patted Sirius' hand. "I don't need to know what happened. I know you. The only reason that I even know you're being punished is because I contacted Albus myself." 

"Why?" Sirius asked. 

"Two weeks in a row without your Monday letters, Sirius? That would've been indication enough that something was wrong - Euphemia was certain that you were in Saint Mungo's and that no one had bothered to notify us. James didn't send any either but that is typical of him so it wasn't as worrisome. But when I contacted Albus and found out that you weren't playing Quidditch anymore, Euphemia was in a right state. I had to slip her a Calming Draught to stop her from flooing directly into the castle to set things straight herself. She's only giving me the chance today because we received that letter from Ms. Evans, inviting me to meet you here."

"Mrs. Potter was that worried?" Sirius had forgotten in the past two weeks what it felt like to have people feel that much concern. He certainly hadn't expected for them to miss his letters.

"Of course she was," Mr. Potter looked at him strangely. "We love you. Whatever you did, it doesn't define who you are." Bloody hell, Sirius could feel tears at the back of his eyes. Where did all of this crying come from? 

"But what if you're wrong?" he couldn't help but ask. "Maybe I am just like the rest of the Blacks. I might as well go join the Knights of Walburgis now."

"The world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters, Sirius," the elderly man shook his head sadly. "Surely you know that."

"Death Eaters?" Sirius asked, momentarily distracted. 

"That's what they're calling themselves now," Fleamont shrugged. "Seems a bit idiotic to me but at least it's honest. Those pureblood maniacs aren't the lords of anything."

"Right," Sirius chuckled, picturing Orion Black turning over in his grave at the comment.

"I only have one question," said Fleamont. "Where is James in all of this? Where are Peter and Remus? Surely they were involved in this whole kerfuffle somehow."

"They aren't speaking to me," Sirius mumbled. Surely, once Mr. Potter realized that his own son wasn't speaking to him, he would realize how awful Sirius truly was. 

"They will," Fleamont said confidently. "James knows a good mate when he sees one. And if he doesn't, let me know and I'll kick his arse. Don't worry about him. The only thing you should be concerned about his writing a nice lengthy letter to Euphemia as soon as you get back to the castle."

"Yes, sir," Sirius agreed. 

"Splendid. Because if you don't, she'll kick all three of our arses and I'd rather prefer to avoid that."

"Yes, sir. I will."

"Good," Fleamont stood to leave. "I need to run over to the apothecary shop and pick up a few things before getting back to my brewing. I will see you when term ends - that is non-negotiable."

Sirius nodded. 

"Oh, and Sirius?" Fleamont stopped once more by the door. "That watch would look much better on your wrist than in your pocket."

Gingerly, Sirius took the watch out and put it back on as a small smile played across his lips. He really did feel much more secure with it than without. As much as he hated to admit when Lily was right, she'd certainly known exactly what he needed. 

"C'mon," he left some coins on the table and waved Lily out of her hiding spot by the window. "I know you were spying on that whole thing. You deserve some of that dark chocolate nonsense you're always raving about."

"Told you I was brilliant," Lily looped her arm through his. Though Sirius may not admit it, he definitely felt like agreeing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE let me know what you think! This is like the fifth draft of this chapter - I just couldn't decide on the best way to blend everything together. Thanks as always for reading!


	22. Chapter 21: The Astronomy Tower

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **TRIGGER WARNING** for nonconsensual sexual activity / assault.   
> Please keep in mind that this is the only type of warning I will be giving within specific chapters. All other possibilities - consensual sexual activity, violence, death, underage drinking, have been mentioned in the story summary and will not be preluded to.

Remus rolled over in his fourposter yet again, throwing an arm across his face with a groan.

"I can't sleep either," came James' voice from the other side of the curtains.

"Neither can I," Peter's voice agreed, motivating Remus to open the curtains and converse with his mates more freely.

"I miss him," said James quietly. "I'm sorry, Moony, I know what he did to you was awful and we've cut him out for a reason but-"

"But we need him," Remus agreed. He'd thought it would help, not being around Sirius. Yet if he were honest, if he were truly honest with himself, he knew that none of this had been Sirius' fault to begin with. It was the wolf that had attacked Snape and James, the wolf that had nearly destroyed everything. Sirius wasn't the one haunting his nightmares, ripping everything and everyone he cared about to shreds. That was all Remus; it had been long before he'd even believed he could attend Hogwarts.

"Feels a bit wrong, just the three of us," Peter continued. "It's supposed to be the four of us - Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs. Not to mention that my Muggle Studies grade is starting to slip without him to make things sound interesting."

"McDonald and Evans are both muggleborn. I'm sure they'd help you," James answered, though Remus knew that he was just trying to avoid Sirius. "'Course, Lily's pretty cross with me at the moment. Said I should just talk things out with Sirius. We had a bit of an argument about it actually."

"Everyone in Gryffindor heard about that row, Prongs," Peter scoffed. "Surprised it took you so long into term to have one."

"We're friends," James ran a hand through his hair.

"And she's right," Remus wanted to get back to the original point. "We should talk to Sirius."

"Are you sure?" James sat up quickly in his four poster, looking to him as if for approval. It was something Remus still didn't understand - didn't they know how lucky he was to have been included at all?

"I'm sure," he answered. "Sirius isn't the one who attacked Snape or you. That was all me."

"Stop speaking rubbish," said James vehemently. "It wasn't your fault."

"Well it's not as if Sirius is the one who was out there scratching people," Remus rolled his eyes. "He's been punished for it. I should've been too."

"He's the one who told the secret though," reminded Peter. "If he hadn't done that, we'd have just ran around the forest the way we've been doing since the start of fifth year. None of it would've happened."

"If I didn't turn into a bloody monster on a full moon, none of it would've happened."

"Next time you call my mate a bloody monster, I'll kick your arse," James chucked his pillow across the room at Remus' head.

"Duly noted," he placed the pillow behind his head for added comfort. "So what's the plan?"

"Wormtail!" James cried. "You're the one with the plans, mate. What d'we do?"

"Seems pretty simple," Peter started rummaging around in his trunk for the map. "We find Sirius and talk to him."

"Talk?" James groaned. "Can't we just invite him to play quidditch or something?"

At this, Remus couldn't help but laugh. James really hadn't been himself without Sirius, none of them had. He quickly pulled on his shoes, thankful that the map would keep them from traipsing across the entire castle. Only a few awkward minutes and they could finally feel whole again.

Sirius fiddled with his watch as he headed towards the Astronomy Tower. As much as he'd appreciated his talk with Mr. Potter the day before, he wasn't sure that barging into the dormitory as if nothing had ever happened was the best plan. For now, he would take things slow and continue to spend time alone. Sirius had found that he didn't mind the solitude much. In fact, he was actually looking forward to smoking a cigarette and reading his letter from Mrs. Potter in private instead.

Sirius had almost reached the top of the tower when he heard the voices. He'd been lucky so far - though he knew that the Astronomy Tower was a popular location for snogging couples, he'd only come across three in the past few weeks. Sighing deeply, he turned to walk back down the stairs and find another place of solitude for the evening.

"Stop it!" came a voice from the Tower, causing Sirius to pause. "Bloody - geroff!" With a sinking feeling, he turned back and bolted up the stairs.

"Damn-"

Mary's sentence was cut off by Tiberius McLaggen's lips, his hand hidden beneath her skirt. Sirius had, of course, been in similar positions before. Sirius had not, however, ever had a girl reacting to him the way that Mary was reacting now. She seemed to be writhing not in pleasure but in an attempt to get away, her hands pushing against Tiberius' shoulders as she turned her face from his.

"Let-go-of-"

There were probably plenty of ways for Sirius to handle the situation. He could talk to McLaggen. He could walk Mary back to Gryffindor Tower calmly, making sure that she was okay. Both of those made perfect sense. Unfortunately, Sirius Black was not one to stand around and think about what made sense. He'd always been impulsive and active. Which is why, instead of going with either of those plans, he ran over and punched Tiberius McLaggen in the face.

"What the-" McLaggen staggered and turned a glassy-eyed stare towards Sirius, though he was cut off by another punch.

"She said to get the fuck off of her," Sirius repeated, pushing his adversary against the wall.

"Don't get your knickers in a twist," McLaggen slurred. "Jus' having a little fun."

"What, you're sloshed?" Sirius scoffed, pushing him a little higher on the wall. "If you become a piece of shit when you drink, you were a piece of shit to start with."

"Sirius, don't-" he turned his attention to Mary, crying on the floor. As much as he wanted to continue taking his anger out on McLaggen, Sirius knew she was the higher priority.

"Just get the fuck out of here," he threatened, releasing the git and turning to walk towards Mary. He'd only taken one step before finding himself hoisted in the air by his ankle. "What the-"

McLaggen fell over quickly, a blur of black hair leaping on top of him. Staring in shock, Sirius felt himself being levitated back to the ground. He turned to see Peter, wand pointed at Sirius, while Remus patted Mary on the back.

"What kind of coward attacks when their opponent isn't looking?" James gave McLaggen a black eye to match the swollen lip he'd already received. "Get the fuck out of here." Looking wildly around, McLaggen ran to the steps, tripping once in his haste.

"Want us to walk you back?" Peter asked Mary gently. She nodded, looping one arm through his and the other through Remus'. Sirius barely noticed them leaving as he turned to stare at his best mate. Why had James defended him? Why were they even here? Could this mean what he hoped it meant?

"James," he said softly.

"D'you want to go for a fly?" James ran a hand through his hair. "I could use one right about now."

"Er, yeah," Sirius smiled from ear to ear. "Just don't start pouting when I beat you in a race around the pitch."


	23. Chapter 22: Full Moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so sorry about being late with this chapter. We had a family emergency so I was with them whenever I wasn't working and then I got sick and just haven't had time to do my normal editing. You can still expect Tuesday's chapter as normal and hopefully a bonus chapter some time next week if I have time. Thank you for being patient with me!

The rest of February seemed to pass without incident as the Gryffindors fell into routine once more. Despite replacing Sirius with fourth-year   
Bilius Linwood as chaser, the Gryffindor quidditch team had beaten the Ravenclaws with a score of 200-140. James had given seeker Leslee Jordan a case of butterbeer to celebrate, as even he couldn't quite condone giving firewhiskey to a third-year. He smiled thinking of how his world had returned to order- Gryffindor remained undefeated, Sirius was back around everyone, Evans was even speaking to him again. James had sent the redhead a bar of Honeyduke's dark chocolate with a simple note: _You were right, don't get used to it._ She'd obviously worked out who it was from, giving him smug looks whenever she saw him and Sirius together. 

"Oi, Prongs," his mate was waving a piece of sausage in front of his face. "You with us?"

"Er, yeah," James noticed Lily raising an eyebrow at him once more before he turned to face Sirius. 

"So what do you think?" Peter asked. 

"Er..." 

"Knew you weren't listening," Sirius laughed and took a bite of the sausage. "Remus' birthday. Hogsmeade. Next Saturday. Y'know Rosmerta will look the other way for his seventeenth."

"Right. Why're we waiting until next weekend?"

"Because his birthday's not until Thursday," said Peter. 

"Not to mention that he's already feeling a little ill getting ready for tomorrow night," Sirius looked down at his lap. 

"Right." How could James have forgotten so easily? With how much trouble the damn moon had caused, he should have the calendar memorized by now. 

"So we celebrate next weekend," Peter prodded. "Probably shouldn't really invite anyone though - Rosmerta can get a bit shirty."

"We can just make it a blokes' night," James agreed. "Haven't had one of those in a while anyway, I think Remus'll like it."

"You sure?" asked Sirius, piling a napkin with toast and bacon to give to Remus when they arrived at Potions. "We had a big party when I turned seventeen. I don't want him thinking we were too lazy to do the same for him."

"Moony's not a big fan of being the center of attention," reminded Peter, picking up his rucksack. "I'm going to go finish up this History of Magic essay. See you lot later."

"D'you need help?" Sirius reached into his own rucksack. "I've finished mine."

"Er, thanks," Peter raised an eyebrow as he took the parchment. "I'll hand it back to you when we get to Binns' class." 

"No worries," said Sirius, waving him off. Peter left the Great Hall, looking back at his mate bemusedly. 

"Since when do you let Wormtail copy your essays?" James asked dubiously. 

"He needs the help," Sirius shrugged, standing from the table to head to Potions. "Besides, he's not copying it. Just using it as a resource." 

James collected his things and walked with Sirius in silence, knowing there was more to it than that. Sirius had been offering help to the three of them for weeks now, ever since they'd reconciled. He'd even overhead McGonagall admonishing Sirius yesterday for trying to turn in his own essay with Remus' name on it, when Remus had already been given an extension on the assignment. Sirius had never cared this much for his own homework, much less anyone else's. 

"D'you, er," Padfoot's voice was barely audible among the hustle of the corridors. "D'you reckon Remus wants me there tomorrow night?"

"What?"

"If he doesn't, you know, I understand," he shifted awkwardly. "I just don't know how to ask. And I'm not going to force him to be around me, those nights are hard enough on him as it is..."

"Don't be a prat," James fought the urge to roll his eyes, knowing that this had likely been bothering his mate for some time. "If Moony didn't want you there, he'd have said something by now." 

"Maybe he just hasn't thought of how to say it..."

"And maybe you're being a prat," James ran a hand through his hair. "Look, there he comes now. Why don't you just ask?" 

"No," Sirius glared, walking away to give Remus the food he'd saved. James didn't know why Sirius had bothered. He'd been trying himself to get Remus to eat more before the full moon for years now. Sure enough, the lycanthrope took two bites before setting the rest in the rubbish bin. 

As the weekend began, James noticed that Sirius seemed more and more nervous. Every time he looked over, his best mate was biting his lip or shuffling his feet. Peter had already snapped once, telling him to stop fidgeting so that he could finish revising for Transfiguration before the full moon. Exasperated, Sirius announced that he was going for a walk to clear his head - he saw no need to tell his mates that he'd been smoking more than ever. He'd barely made it through the portrait hole before running into Julia Hawthorne. 

"Siri!" she cried happily. "Is James in there? I haven't seen him all day."

"Er," Sirius quickly checked his watch. They only had an hour before they'd need to arrive at the Whomping Willow. "Haven't seen him."

"Oh," Hawthorne pouted. "Are you two having another row?"

 _She calls two weeks without speaking after the biggest mistake of my life a row?_ thought Sirius. Even though Prongs obviously hadn't told her the secret, a 'row' was an incredible understatement. 

"Er, no," Sirius replied, realizing he probably shouldn't be staring at his best mate's girlfriend as if she were mental even if she was. "Just haven't seen him around much since dinner."

"Well, alright," Hawthorne sighed. "Let him know I'm looking for him, will you? Most of my mates are either revising or off with their own boyfriends and it's a bit lonely."

"Right," Sirius nodded, feeling somewhat guilty that he knew James wouldn't be spending any time with his girlfriend tonight. He wondered what Prongs had been telling her during the previous full moons. 

"See you," she smiled again before turning back toward Ravenclaw tower. Sirius let out a deep sigh before heading out to the grounds for a cigarette. He knew Remus had forgiven him, but what if Moony hadn't? There had been times before that Remus had turned while upset and the wolf had been more aggressive than usual. What if it happened tonight?

 _If it does, I won't say anything,_ Sirius told himself. _I deserve it, putting Remus and James at risk like I did._

He smoked through two cigarettes and was about to pull out a third when he heard footsteps approaching. 

"You coming?" came James' voice, though his body wasn't visible.

"Yeah," Sirius followed the small rat he saw on the ground to where the voice had originated from, allowing James to pull his invisibility cloak over them both. It was much tighter than it had been when James had nicked it from his dad in first year. What had once fit all four Marauders now barely fit two - three if Peter was in rat form. Careful not to allow their feet to be seen, the boys shuffled towards the Whomping Willow, where Wormtail scurried to the base to touch the knot and allow them into the tunnel. An intense feeling of dread came over Sirius as he climbed into the tunnel, moving more slowly than he normally would. He felt a nervous shiver go down his spine as the wolf howled above him. 

_Stop being a git,_ he admonished himself. _You've proved yourself more dangerous than he is._

"Moony!" called James jovially as he entered the room. "Good seeing you mate." The wolf sniffed the air and began walking slowly towards James, who transformed quickly into Prongs. Sirius watched as the stag poked the wolf gently with his antlers, a typical greeting for two. 

Shyly, Sirius transformed into Padfoot and waited to be noticed. It didn't take long for Moony to come over, sniffing twice before giving a low growl. Padfoot lowered his head and emitted a quiet whine. Moony snapped his teeth once more before seeming to deem the dog's presence acceptable, bounding around to sniff Wormtail and lift the rat to sit on his snout. He scratched at the door a few times before James transformed back just long enough to open the lock before leading them out as Prongs. 

Padfoot padded along behind the little group, following the wolf's lead on their adventure into the forest. He'd missed being able to run around as a dog, focusing on the present without so many emotional nuances to get bogged down in. Happily, he barked at some squirrels, chasing them into a tree. He responded to Moony's howl with one of his own, playfully tackling the wolf as he'd done so many times before. Moony rolled back on top of him, pawing him in a way that wouldn't cause injury. Padfoot responded by taking a playful nip at Moony's ankle. This was a game they'd played many times, it would be Moony's turn to tackle next. Surely enough, Moony did tackle Padfoot. The dog waved his tail happily as he moved to stand but was unable to do so as the wolf continued pinning him down. He let out a small whine, trying to draw attention to his discomfort. Instead of letting him up, however, the wolf let out another low growl, snapping his teeth. Padfoot moved again to free himself, though he was quickly scratched across the cheek by Moony's claws. He turned away quickly, only to see Prongs prod the wolf up with his antlers. Padfoot stood in the clearing, waiting to see if Moony wanted to play again, only to look down and see Wormtail running his circles. As soon as the rat realized he had Padfoot's attention, he scurried to the edge of the clearing and back to the dog before running to the edge again. Seeing that Prongs was still holding the wolf back, Padfoot followed Wormtail's instruction and left the forest with his tail between his legs. He sat quietly in the garden by Hagrid's hut, keeping an eye on the Whomping Willow until his friends returned. 

"Y'know he won't remember it," said an exhausted-looking James as he walked to meet up with the dog. Padfoot merely whined and began trotting after his friends toward the castle. 

"It's nearly dawn," Peter told him, patting the dog on the head. "We need to get back to the tower before Madam Pomfrey comes out here."

"Transform back so we can use the cloak," James prodded. "We're cutting it a little close on time."

Silently, Sirius acquiesced and allowed James to throw the cloak over the two of them as Peter turned back into Wormtail and led the way into the castle. They ran into no one along the way, shuffling to the common room and removing the cloak only to tell the password. Once upstairs, Sirius heard Peter begin snoring immediately. He simply lay in his own four-poster wondering about the night's events. 

"He really has forgiven you," said James softly from his own bed. "Don't go thinking that he hasn't."

"Seemed a bit miffed when he was clawing at me tonight," Sirius couldn't keep the thought from escaping.

"He's still working through it," James replied calmly. "It was his idea to tell you we forgave you in the first place. Don't go getting all mopey on us again - you're no fun when you're mopey."

"I'm so sorry, Your Highness," Sirius scoffed. "I'll try to remain entertaining for you."

"You know that's not what I meant," Sirius could picture James running a hand through his hair. "Just know we're mates, alright?"

"Yeah, alright," he agreed. "Oh, I almost forgot. Hawthorne was looking for you earlier. Said she was a little lonely." He thought he heard James groan. 

"Guess I know who I'll be revising with later."

"What d'you normally tell her on a full moon?" Sirius asked. "I just acted like I hadn't seen you." 

"That's fine," came James' reply. "I usually just avoid her honestly. S'not as if I can tell her where I'm going. She'll be alright - I'm still not inviting her to Hogsmeade next Saturday."

"You could," said Sirius, though he had to admit that he wasn't overly fond of the bird. "She is your girlfriend after all."

"We need a blokes' night," James answered. "You'll see. We'll have our blokes' night and it'll be just like old times and you'll finally believe you've been forgiven." 

Sirius smiled quietly in his bed. It was a nice thought - being fully forgiven, despite not truly feeling as if he ought to be. Running a hand over the scratch on his cheek, he decided to make Remus' birthday the best blokes' night they'd had yet.


	24. Chapter 23: Blokes' Night

Lily pulled on the ends of her skirt as she stumbled after her mates down the hidden passage to Honeyduke's. Though she didn't particularly like to picture McGonagall's reaction if the sixth-year girls were caught sneaking out of the castle, one look at Mary reaffirmed her resolve. Mary'd barely spoken to anyone for nearly two weeks now and had been spending much more time in the library than usual. Dorcas may have only suggested the Three Broomsticks as an excuse to drink but Lily knew that their friend desperately needed to let loose. 

"This is going to be lovely," she told her mates, linking arms with Mary. "When was the last time we did something - just us four girls?"

"I'm not even sure," Kiara speculated, leading the way as she was the only one sensible enough to wear shoes without heels. "Usually at least one of us is out."

"Exactly," Lily agreed. "We need this night - no blokes, no revision, just four mates."

"Mind, that doesn't mean that I won't ditch the lot of you for someone fit," Dorcas somehow managed to touch up her lipstick while walking. 

"You will do no such thing," Lily admonished. She took a step back as Kiara opened the Honeyduke's latch. They'd rarely taken this route - one fairly well known among the older Hogwarts students - but she rationalized to herself that they weren't truly doing anything wrong. All of the merchandise would remain in its proper place, no matter how badly she may desire to take a hunk of dark chocolate with her. 

"Let's make sure that Rosmerta will serve us first," said Kiara, biting her lip. 

"I don't see why she wouldn't," laughed Dorcas. "Mary's birthday was Valentine's -we're all of age. Not to mention that she's been serving the boys since our fifth year at least."

"I really don't feel much like drinking anyway," Mary said quietly. 

"We're just going to have a little fun is all," Lily patted her dormitory mate's arm soothingly as she felt Mary tense.

The bell above the door of the Three Broomsticks rang out as the girls entered, quickly looking around for the best booth. 

"Someone's in our favorite spot," frowned Kiara. 

"Shacklebolt!" called a familiar voice before Lily was able to crane her neck and identify the booth's occupants. "Moony, check it out - the girls have come to celebrate your birthday."

"Er," Lily tightened her grip slightly on Mary's arm. "Sorry, Sirius. We were trying to have a girls' night."

"No worries," James was smiling at her and running a hand through his hair. Suddenly, Lily found herself wishing she'd spent a little longer on her makeup before leaving. "We were planning to have a blokes' night. We won't bother you lot."

"Thanks," Lily smiled at him, though a small part of her felt disappointed at his words. "We'll just head to another booth."

Of course, none of the girls were able to remain in their other booth for long. After an hour or so of drinking and finding out absolutely nothing new about Mary, Lily was tapping her foot impatiently on the barstool and wishing they'd sat with the boys after all. 

"Oi," said Peter, stumbling over to them and smacking the table. "You lot get on over to our booth. It's M-Moony's seventeenth and it's high time for shots."

"We're in!" cried Dorcas, who had had more to drink than her mates already. "Aren't we ladies?" 

"I don't see any harm in it," shrugged Kiara, slurring her words ever so slightly. 

"Gryffindors! Shots! Now!" Sirius' bark carried across the crowded pub. "Let's hop to it." Lily and Dorcas exchanged a quick glance before hopping on one foot to join him, giggling the entire way. 

"Alright there, Evans?" James reached out a hand to steady her as she reached the table.

"Of course I am," she took the seat next to him. It was the closest option, really - no need to go around the table to sit by Remus as Dorcas had done. "I'm absolutely brill."

"'Course you are," he shot her a wink. She felt her stomach begin tying itself in knots - perhaps she shouldn't have had as many drinks as she had. 

"Mary!" Lily called, attempting to distract herself from the acrobatics in her stomach. "Come along, I'll make a space for you."

"Getting a little close to Pr-Prongs there, huh Evans?" Peter asked. 

"I'm making a space for Mary," she replied loftily, deciding that she really didn't like Peter that much as she scooted against James. 

"If you lot are all settled," Sirius rolled his eyes, a glass raised in the air, "I'd like to propose a toast to our dear Moony, a bloke who acts older than all of us despite being the youngest in the year."

"My birthday's not 'till June ya prat," Peter argued, wagging a finger at Sirius as they all set their glasses down. 

"Say that a little louder in the pub, why don't you?" James rolled his eyes. "You're getting a little sloppy there, Wormtail."

"Shut up," said Remus, his eyes glassy. "My birthday, my mates get to be sloppy."

"Yes sir, Mr. Lupin," Sirius saluted, taking a second shot he'd somehow procured for himself. "I'll get right on that."

"Git," Remus responded fondly. 

"I'm bored," sighed Dorcas, grabbing Remus' arm. "Come dance with me, birthday boy."

"Er-" he was whisked away before being able to answer. 

"Should we go after him?" Mary raised an eyebrow. 

"Nah," laughed Kiara. "I want to dance, too - c'mon, Peter."

"Erm," Lily choked back a laugh at the look of discomfort across Peter's face. "Why me?"

"Because you're not going to try and convince me to cheat on my boyfriend after one dance like those random blokes over there are," Kiara shrugged. Lily sat at the booth for only minutes before pulling James onto the dance floor after their mates.

"Having fun?" Lily felt her stomach tie itself into another knot as he smiled at her - she dearly hoped she wouldn't be sick on him.

"'Course I am," she laughed.

"Me too," James spun her quickly. Lily smiled again looking up at him. If anyone had predicted this during their first year, she'd probably have called them mental. 

"Are we mates?" she blurted, her cheeks quickly turning pink as she realized what she'd said. 

"What?" James pulled back to look at her. "What d'you mean? 'Course we're mates."

"Good," Lily grinned, tucking her head against his chest as the music slowed. "I like being mates. We weren't very matey for a while there, especially fifth year."

"We all did things in fifth year we aren't exactly proud of," James placed his hands chastely on her waist, swaying to the beat. "I mean, if you can be my mate after-"

"Don't," Lily cut him off. "That's over and done with. I don't want to ruin the evening."

"Alright," agreed James, grinning into her hair. "Whatever makes you happy."

"I'm sorry Julia isn't here," Lily cringed at herself - why had she felt the need to share that particular thought? "I'm sure you'd rather be dancing with your girlfriend."

"S'alright," James answered noncommittally. "Sorry Gideon isn't here either."

"Gideon?" Lily pulled back to look up at him. "What're you talking about?"

"Aren't you-" James ran a hand through his hair, "er, aren't you two together?"

"What?" Lily couldn't stop herself from laughing in his face just a bit, though she knew he looked embarrassed. "Me and Gideon? Gideon Prewett?"

"Er... Yes?" It looked as if James would pull his hair out from all the tugging. 

"No, James," Lily giggled as she settled back against him. "Gideon and I are only mates. And trust me when I say that there is no chance of that changing."

"Oh," James still had not resumed dancing. "Er, right then."

"Prongs!" cried Remus, hurrying up to the pair. "Time to go mate, Pete's getting sick outside. Rosemerta's less than pleased."

"We should probably go too," Lily pulled away to locate the other girls, missing the inquisitive look Remus was giving James over the top of her head. "We can all walk back together."

"How did you lot sneak down here, anyway?" James asked, not yet going to assist Peter. 

"Honeyduke's cellar," Lily shrugged, unable to stop herself from smiling broadly at the look of pride crossing James' features. 

"Shouldn't prefects be stopping people from sneaking out of the castle?"

"Remus is a prefect, too," she stumbled a bit as she crossed her arms in an attempt to look intimidating. 

"He doesn't count," James waved her off as they went to join their mates, reaching into his pocket. 

"Already took care of it," said Sirius, offering his hand to assist Mary out of the booth despite her lack of stumbling. 

"Thank you," said Lily, not even attempting to tally the number of drinks their group had consumed. 

"Not a worry, Miss Evans," Sirius smiled cheekily as he held the door open for her. "I did retain some of my pureblood manners, you know." He offered Lily his arm as if to further drive the point home, assisting her on the walk back to Honeyduke's.

Mary watched tiredly as her mates stumbled loudly back to the castle - she was surprised no one was alerted by all the noise they were making. By the time they'd reached the Gryffindor common room, Peter had retched twice, Remus had knocked over a suit of armor, and Dorcas was loudly explaining to anyone who would listen - namely, just Sirius - why Hogwarts should allow hippogriffs as pets. She held back a laugh as she watched the lot stagger up the dormitory steps, raising an eyebrow when Lily reached out to hug each boy goodnight. 

"Alright, McDonald?" Sirius stopped at the bottom of the boys' staircase as she went to climb her own, the last two of the group in the common room. 

"I'm fine," she shrugged. "Not even a bit pissed."

"I know," Sirius replied. "I was the one taking your shots for you." 

"Thanks for that," Mary muttered, eyes downcast. "Didn't much feel like losing control tonight."

"S'alright to let loose," she looked up to see him still standing there with his arms crossed. "We're not going to let anything happen."

"It wasn't supposed to happen before," she argued. "It was bad enough with Mulciber and Avery - at least there was a reason for me not to fight them off then. But Tiberius? There was no curse. He was just stronger than me."

"McDonald-"

"I hate it," Mary continued, eyes stinging. "I haven't even mentioned anything to the girls, I've been too embarrassed. Because every time I think of it, you know what I remember? Him saying how _lucky_ I was for him to want a dirty mudblood like me."

"He's an arsehole," Sirius stepped off of the staircase to walk towards her. "Don't let it get to you."

"It's not as if I have a choice, do I?" Mary scoffed. "You've seen the Prophet, there are plenty of people who agree with him."

"They're idiots."

"Maybe so," she shrugged. "But they're the ones with the power. G'night, Sirius." Quickly, Mary turned and walked up the staircase to find her dormitory mates already sleeping peacefully in their beds. She sighed softly as she changed into her pajamas, wondering how much longer it'd be before Kiara and Dorcas realized how dangerous a friendship with two mudbloods would be.


	25. Chapter 24: Stag and Doe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So first of all, I am VERY SORRY for taking so long to update. I have lots of reasons that you probably don't care about (but one of which was getting caught up in ideas for the fic I'm writing after this one, so yay?). This chapter covers a lot of seemingly random moments but they are all important. A few weeks pass where you see the separating line, in case that isn't clear. I struggled a good bit with the right way to wrap things up with that last scene and it still feels a little abrupt to me so please don't hate it. 
> 
> As always, your feedback is VERY appreciated. Thank you for reading/caring.

"Good morning!" chirped Julia, giving her boyfriend a kiss on the cheek as she joined him at the Gryffindor table. 

"Too loud," grumbled Sirius from his other side. 

"How was your blokes' night?" Julia asked, choosing to ignore Sirius as usual. 

"Brill," James answered while taking another bite of bacon. "Pete got sick near the end though so Rosmerta got a bit shirty with us. He and Moony are still sleeping."

"Need coffee," grunted Dorcas Meadowes as she slumped into the seat across from Sirius. "Feel like death."

"Maybe you shouldn't have been accepting all those drinks from those older blokes then," said Mary McDonald daintily, the only one of the sixth-year Gryffindors girls to look alert. 

"I'm going to feed you to a hippogriff," said Dorcas. 

"Why do you look like you aren't hungover?" Lily Evans raised an eyebrow at James, inspiring Julia to scoot a little closer to her boyfriend. 

"Been up for a while," James shrugged.

"Prongs is bloody mental," said Sirius. "Probably ran three kilometers this morning already."

"Five," James corrected, reaching for some sausage to add to his fairly full plate. "It really does help the hangovers. Not to mention that I need to stay in shape for Quidditch. It'd be bad form for the captain to show up too hungover to practice."

"We didn't even get in until after 3 and you've already done all that?" Evans stared at him incredulously. Julia snapped to attention at her words. 

"We?"

"Well yeah," the redhead looked at her as if Julia were a particularly unintelligent rock. "The sixth-year Gryffindors."

"They were at the Three Broomsticks with you?" Julia asked, noticing James' grimace. 

"Er," James ran a hand through his hair. 

"It was a nice time," said Dorcas. "You should've joined us."

"Right," Julia said icily, standing from the table. "I'll talk to you later."

Half hoping that James would follow her yet knowing that he probably wouldn't, Julia strode from the Great Hall to find an empty classroom to read in. As she came closer to the corner classroom on the second floor, her favorite place for solitude, Julia could feel the weight leaving her shoulders. 

"Oh, Merlin!" cried Alice Longbottom as the door opened. Julia tried to hide her annoyance - of all the places in the castle, they had to shag in her reading area? It was almost as if they were rubbing it in her face that other couples actually spent time alone together.

"Sorry," she mumbled, training her eyes to the ceiling to avoid the view, mentally reminding herself that the Longbottoms' relationship had nothing to do with her own.   
Alice couldn't help but giggle as Julia left. 

"Should I be feeling embarrassed?" she asked, looking lovingly at her husband. "Because I really don't."

"Just think," Frank placed a kiss on her forehead. "Once term ends we'll move into a nice empty house all our own."

"We need to think about it before Easter hols," said Alice as she quickly redressed and took a seat on the floor. "Your mum wrote me the other day about it and I'd prefer not to let her pick out our house for us."

"Well Dilly will be ours, since neither of us will feel up to cooking after Auror training every day, so we'll need a space for her to sleep," Frank laid his head in his wife's lap. "And we'll need plenty of bedrooms for the children."

"Who will not be conceived until our three years of training is complete," Alice reminded him. 

"Obviously," said Frank. "I'd like to have a little bit of time to spend with them."

"All five of them," agreed Alice. They'd long ago agreed that their own solitary childhoods had been far too lonely. "And a small garden. Nothing like Mum and Dad's greenhouses but it wouldn't feel right not to have anything."

"We're going to have a bloody good future, aren't we?" Frank smiled, sitting up. 

"Yeah," Alice pulled him in for another kiss, "a bloody brilliant future."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Honestly, when will we need this in the future?" grumbled Sirius on the way to Defense on Tuesday. "I don't exactly plan on spending much time around Azkaban."

"I think it's neat," argued James. He'd actually been able to produce some blurry white mist when they'd practiced the charm in the dormitory after the last class and suspected that Sirius was simply upset that he still couldn't produce anything. 

"I still wish I could get a full shape," said Remus as he led the way into the classroom. "I really want to know what mine would be."

"Reckon it's the same as our, er, other forms?" Peter asked. 

"Have you lot managed the full Patronus already?" Lily interrupted as she entered the classroom. "I've gotten a big blur but can't tell what it's supposed to be yet. Dorcas got a badger though."

"It was just the once," Dorcas' broad smile took away from the humble tone her voice seemed to be attempting. 

"Wonder what it means," Lily continued as if her friend hadn't spoken. "They're supposed to represent your soul. I may look in the library during free period today."

James tuned Panworth out as the professor started the class and reviewed their last lesson on the Patronus charm, ruminating on what his friends had said. Would his Patronus be the same as his Animagus form? He was fairly fond of Prongs, so that would be alright. Maybe Lily would find something to explain why he'd become a stag of all things. The Animagus books they'd used had said you couldn't choose but hadn't ever made it clear why people ended up with the forms they had. Though James reckoned he should count himself lucky, glancing over at Peter. At least he wasn't a rat. 

Choosing their first time transforming as Animagi as his memory, James tried the charm again. The mist seemed more solid this time, forming a blurry shape that resembled Prongs, though James rationalized that it may have just seemed that way because of his train of thoughts. 

"Nearly there, Miss Evans!" came Professor Panworth's voice, breaking James' concentration. He watched as Lily closed her eyes before saying the spell again. 

"Expecto Patronum!" 

The class oohed and aahed over Lily's Patronus, a silver doe that walked slowly around the classroom. James followed the doe with his eyes as it made its way to Lily and nuzzled its head against her outstretched hand. She looked radiant, the emerald of her eyes shining brightly as she watched the doe's progress. The doe faded and Lily looked up, locking eyes with James and causing him to run a hand through his hair as she smiled, a slight blush on her cheeks. 

"Alright, Prongs?" asked Peter, a concerned expression on his face. 

"Er, yeah..." said James, still thinking of Lily's doe. She'd smiled at him that way in the Three Broomsticks as well. 

"Ready to try it again?" Moony asked. James raised his wand in agreement, though he doubted he'd be able to accomplish anything with his thoughts so jumbled.

"Expecto Patronum!" To James' surprise, the mist from his wand solidified and took shape in front of him. 

"Hello, Prongs," he said softly, running his hand over the mist and watching as the stag turned to Moony. Remus laughed as the Patronus nudged him playfully. 

"Guess we know what mine and Wormy's will be, huh?" Sirius whispered as they watched the stag turn from Remus and strut over to the Gryffindor girls. Prongs seemed to look at Lily curiously, if Patronuses were able to look curiously, as she lifted her wand and cast the charm again. Watching her closely, James noticed a blush spread across Lily's features as her doe and his stag nuzzled against one another before disappearing. When she met his eyes, James could find no reason to ever look away.


	26. Chapter 25: Happy Birthday, James

"I feel like a bint," sighed Julia. "I know it's your birthday but I just - I can't do it anymore. And it wouldn't have been right to lead you on, would it? Plus, this way you can spend the whole evening with your mates the way you know you want to do instead of having to spend time with me."

"Er, yeah," James ran a hand through his hair. He supposed he should feel a bit more upset than he did - most blokes would be heartbroken to be broken up with on their seventeenth birthday. He felt oddly relieved. 

"I just don't think we're right together," Julia explained. She'd planned this conversation a week ago, though she'd planned to wait and have it once James' birthday had passed and now couldn't remember any of what she'd planned to say. "I'm really sorry."

"Don't be," James sighed. "You're right, really. I don't think I've been the best boyfriend."

"Maybe for someone else," she agreed. 

"Er, yeah," James ran a hand through his hair again. "So, are we mates now?"

"Of course," Julia gave him a small smile. "Although I think I'll skip the big birthday do tonight if you don't mind."

"No, er, I understand," he nodded. "See you around?"

"See you." 

Julia watched quietly as James walked away. She managed to keep her head high until she saw him reenter the castle, then sat on the ground to let her tears flow. She'd been excited when he'd first asked her out those months ago but this relationship just wasn't at all what she'd been expecting. Her mates had been telling her for weeks now that she needed to ditch him. It had been embarrassing enough in the beginning, making excuses when she couldn't find James or when he'd spend time with his mates instead of with her. The final straw, to Julia's mates at least, had been when he'd blown her off to have a "blokes' night" and spent it in the company of Lily Evans and the other girls in Gryffindor House. Julia's best mate Claudia Finch had been saying since before he'd ever asked Julia out that she believed James still fancied Lily. Of course, the now well-known news that James and Lily's Patronuses were a matched set didn't help to deter Claudia's theory. 

Julia sighed as she stood and wiped her face. A small part of her had known that this relationship wasn't meant to last. She at least hoped James would have the decency to wait a bit before asking Lily out, though she suspected he wasn't as aware of the redhead's affections as most of their classmates were. Stoically, she headed towards Ravenclaw Tower, wondering how quickly news would spread that James Potter was once again single. She'd have to ask Claudia to set her up with someone soon to make sure that everyone knew it was Julia that orchestrated the breakup.

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"None of the books I've found say that complimentary Patronuses actually mean anything," Lily rolled her eyes as she explained this to her mates yet again, "just that it's fairly rare."

"So it probably does mean something and hasn't happened often enough to be really studied," Mary prodded. 

"Probably that we're similar or something," Lily sighed. "It really isn't that big of a deal." 

"Whatever you say, Lils," Kiara rolled her eyes. "At least the party is almost ready to start, Julia should have him back soon."

"Wonder what she gave him," laughed Dorcas. 

"Ew, I don't even want to think about it," Kiara groaned. "The only people I want to picture shagging are myself and Otis, thank you very much."

"You really think they've shagged?" Lily asked, attempting to seem nonchalant. 

"He doesn't seem to fancy her much," said Dorcas, pulling out the customary pre-party firewhiskey bottle. "But you never really know with blokes do you?"

"We knew in second year when he sent Lily that Valentine, remember?" Mary laughed. "I was finding confetti around the dormitory for weeks."

"That was just a joke," argued Lily, remembering how embarrassed she'd been. "Not to mention that it was four years ago. It's not as if James still fancies me now."

"Must be why he's dating Julia," Mary nodded, sharing a look with Kiara over Lily's head. "Are we all almost ready?"

"Not until you take a shot," Dorcas thrust the bottle in front of her roommate. "I'll not have you being a Sober Sally again tonight."

"Honestly," Mary rolled her eyes and took a quick drink. "Are you satisfied?"

"Will you lot come on?" asked Kiara. "I want to see this banner Pete was so intent on keeping a secret. I swear that boy could be a famous artist."

"I saw him working on an outline of the whole castle once," said Mary, eager to join the change of subject. "Got real shirty with me when I asked about it though."

Lily checked her hair again quickly before following her mates down to the Common Room, though she wasn't sure why she bothered. She hadn't been able to get James off her brain since that night in the Three Broomsticks, girlfriend or no. 

_But he does have a girlfriend, you tart,_ she admonished herself. _Not to mention the fact that he's your mate and clearly not interested in you._

James had been interested in her, back in second year. It was rather cute to look back on even if most of his antics had annoyed her at the time. It had been embarrassing at twelve to admit you fancied anyone; she never could've admitted her true feelings to him then. Of course, that had also been when Lily's best friend was Sev and Sev's worst enemy was James.

 _And now he's grown up and moved on,_ Lily reminded herself, _from hexing Sev and from fancying you._ She couldn't fight the small smile she felt crossing her features as the object of her thoughts entered the Common Rooms to shouts of "Happy Birthday!" 

"Want a drink?" offered Gideon, appearing beside her. 

"Of course," Lily agreed readily, quickly downing half of it before tearing her eyes off of James. 

"Might want to be a bit sneakier about that," Gideon whispered. 

"About what?"

"Well when I don't want people to know who I fancy, I try not to make eyes at him in front of the whole House," Gideon chuckled. 

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lily took another sip of her drink in an attempt to hide her blush. "James thought you and I were dating, you know."

"Only in your wildest dreams," he winked as he left her to join his twin at the butterbeer pong table. Lily sighed before heading over to where Dorcas and Mary were sitting with James and his mates. 

"Nice shirt," she complimented, noting his new Puddlemere United jersey. 

"Thanks," James smiled. "The blokes got it for me. Mum and Dad got us tickets to a match for summer hols."

"I've got your gift upstairs," Lily replied, feeling embarrassed. "It's really just firewhiskey and treacle tart but I figured you wouldn't want to share with this lot."

"Treacle tart's my favorite," said James. Lily took a long swig of her drink, hoping that if she drowned her stomach in liquor it would stop doing somersaults. 

"What'd Julia give you?" Dorcas asked, unable to stop herself. "We were all debating it earlier."

"Shut up, Dorcas," Lily snapped. At the rate this conversation was going, her face was soon going to be as red as her hair. "Not all of us were."

"She, er," James ruffled his hair, looking as if he felt as awkward as Lily did. "She actually broke up with me, to tell you the truth."

"On your birthday?" asked Remus, standing as if he were ready to go argue her decision. 

"Why didn't you tell us?" Peter put a hand on Remus' arm. 

"I dunno," James shrugged, downing his drink. 

"Tough break, mate," Sirius put a hand on his shoulder. "Y'know what'll make you feel better?"

"What?"

"Strip Exploding Snap!" The entire group groaned. Sirius had been trying to create this game since their fourth year; it had yet to catch on with anyone other than him and occasionally a very drunk Peter. 

"I think I'll settle for another drink," laughed James, stumbling away from the chairs and heading towards a drink table with Remus. Lily pretended not to look at his arse as she contemplated this new development. 

_Still doesn't mean he's interested in you, reminded the nagging voice in her head. They just broke up today._ Lily tried to focus in on that voice, the reasonable voice. Yet she couldn't stop another voice from thinking that she wouldn't mind giving James the birthday present Julia Hawthorne had clearly missed out on.

"Hey, Lily," Alice sat in the chair James had just vacated, successfully tearing Lily's attention away from his arse. "Slughorn asked me to let you know - he's having another party on Friday night before Easter hols start. Shacklebolt's invited again too, obviously."

"That's somewhat short notice," Lily raised an eyebrow. 

"One of the many perks of getting married early," Alice smiled. "No matter how short the notice, I always have a date." Lily quickly went into panic mode as she dismissed the idea to invite James. It would be too awkward, fancying him and knowing that he didn't feel the same way. No, she what she needed to do was find a mate to take along - the sooner the better. 

"Sirius!" she cried as she noticed her friend moving to leave the chairs they currently occupied. "Be my date?"

"To the Slug Club?" Sirius asked incredulously. "Bloody loon's been trying to get me to join his club since first year. I can't give in now."

"That's too bad," Lily shook her head sadly. "I thought you were type of bloke to have fun anywhere but I guess I was wrong. Must be Peter that makes things fun."

"Evans..." Sirius glared. 

"Not to mention how much it would annoy your brother," she continued, knowing that this would be the sticking point. "Seeing how well you can make connections even without the Black family behind you would just drive him mad."

"I'm in," agreed Sirius quickly, just as Lily had predicted he would. "I'm going to grab another drink - you ladies want anything?" 

"No thanks," said Alice. "I have eaten something weird - just the idea of any of the alcohol makes me feel queasy. I was actually on the way up to bed when I saw Lily here."

"Well rest up!" Sirius exclaimed. "You have to save your strength for Slughorn's bash. Trust me, it'll be the best one he's ever had since I'll be in attendance." Lily smiled at the thought. She'd have plenty of fun with Sirius without any of the stress of a real date. If James were to see her in her dress robes, all the better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter right on time, be proud! I also sat down today and made more detailed plans for the next five or so chapters so I should hopefully be able to stay on track. Things are going to get a bit more intense. 
> 
> Please continue to comment, leave kudos, etc. It seriously makes my day and inspires me to write!


	27. Chapter 26: Revelations

Andromeda tightened her grip on her daughter's hand as she strode purposefully through the Leaky Cauldron. Just a quick trip, in and out of the apothecary, then she would be able to relax.

"Mummy?" Nymphadora batted those beautiful eyelashes and pointed in the direction of Fortescue's. "Ice cream?" Alright, so maybe they could add one stop to the quick trip.

"If you behave," Andromeda nodded. Her mother would have been appalled- Florean could be scooping the ice cream with the same spoon as the one he used for muggleborns.

"Okay," smiled Nymphadora, her hair turning yellow as it always did when she was especially pleased.

Andromeda was filled with fondness for her daughter, prodding her yet again to be cautious. The Blacks were not exactly keen on having a half-blood Metamorphmagus skipping around with their blood and Andromeda was hoping to avoid a family reunion as much as possible. She smirked as she came within sight of the apothecary door. If her suspicions were correct, the family would soon have another reason to hate her. She quickly collected the potions ingredients necessary for the pregnancy potion - Andromeda hoped to have it confirmed before Ted came home from work that evening. Just the thought of her husband put a smile on Andromeda's face as she paid for her wares and began leading Nymphadora in the direction of Fortescue's. For all the difficulties they'd faced when they were dating, Andromeda and Ted were blissfully happy in their marriage. They had a beautiful, kind child and would possibly have a second in a few months time as well. Lost as she was in her daydreams, Andromeda didn't notice the quiet figure watching them from the shadows. She didn't realize that she was being followed until the purple light sped towards her, causing an intense pain in her stomach as she felt warm liquid spreading between her thighs. She looked down quickly, noticing the blood spreading onto her robes.

"Mummy? Mummy!" cried Nymphadora as Andromeda tightened her grip on her daughter's hand.

"The healers are on their way from St. Mungo's," said the apothecary shop worker. Andromeda hadn't even noticed her arrival. She felt tears begin to form as she thought of the potions ingredients in her bag and the blood between her thighs. But who- she looked around wildly, catching sight of a mess of curly black hair walking haughtily away from the scene. Bella.

"Mummy?" asked Nymphadora again. Just her voice filled Andromeda with rage, thinking of the danger her dear sister had put the child in.

"It's alright, darling," she soothed, relying on years of Black etiquette to hide her true emotions. "We're just going to pay a little visit to the hospital."  
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"I don't need to go to the Hospital Wing," Alice groaned. "I just need a nap."

"You've never napped this much," said Zoe Freeland, looking worriedly at her dormitory mate.

"I'm allowed to be tired," said Alice. "And I have Slughorn's do tonight. I'll meet up with you lot later, I swear."

"Alright, if you're sure."

Alice breathed a sigh of relief as her friend closed the dormitory door behind her. It was almost reminiscent of her mother, the way Zoe hovered and noticed the smaller changes. Alice gave a small smile at the thought, surprised that she was able to think of her mother without crying. She didn't think she'd been able to do so since the fire. She hoped to one day be half the mother June had been. Her mum would've known exactly what to do about whatever illness Alice had caught. For over a week now, she'd been exhausted. She had no appetite at normal meal times yet would desire steak at 5am. Then again, if she really though about it, Alice had always gotten weird cravings around her period.

_Her period._

Alice threw her duvet to the floor and dug into her school bag, rummaging for her homework planner. Flipping to the calendar, Alice felt her heart stop beating. 

"Oh. Oh, Merlin."  
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"Oh, Merlin," Lily sighed as stared in the mirror. Her hair was a mess. 

"You look fine," Mary didn't even bother to look up from where she was reading Witch Weekly on her bed. 

"Fine is not a compliment," Lily glared, applying Sleekeazy's liberally. 

"You know you're gorgeous," Mary rolled her eyes. "And aren't you taking Sirius? It isn't like you're trying to impress him." 

"You never know who else might see," the redhead focused on applying eyeliner quickly to avoid seeing Mary's expression. 

"You do realize that everyone in this castle knows what you look like, right?" 

"Mar?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Shut up," Lily blotted her lipstick and threw on a pair of Kiara's heels. "Do I look acceptable?" 

"Well I still wouldn't shag you," Mary laughed, "but I'm sure some blokes would find you appealing. Especially ones with glasses and messy hair." 

Lily fought the blush spreading across her cheeks, checking her watch as she quickly exited the dormitory without responding to her mate. Punctual as always, if anyone cared to see her off they'd simply need to be present in the Common Room at the time she'd told Sirius. Not that she'd purposefully discussed these things in front of certain people, of course. James just happened to be around Sirius quite frequently. It would be weird if she hadn't mentioned the time in front of him. Right? 

"Hello, Evans," greeted Peter as she entered the common room, smiling from his seat across the chess board from James. "You look nice." 

"Why thank you, Peter," Lily smiled. "You ought to give Mary some tips on how to properly compliment your mates. Said she didn't know why I bothered since everyone in the castle already knows what I look like." 

"Mary said that?" Peter asked, his brow furrowing. "But she usually-" 

"She must be off her rocker," James interrupted. "You look amazing. Er, not that you normally look bad or anything..." 

"Right, er, thanks," said Lily, fiddling with her hands. "So where is that date of mine?" 

"Sirius?" James scoffed. "He's never on time for anything. Has to use an entire bottle of Sleekeazy's to do anything with his hair." 

"You're welcome for that," said Sirius as he came down the boys' dormitory steps and joined the group. "I'm just trying to contribute to your inheritance, mate." 

"Dad owls it to you for free!" 

"No need to split hairs," Sirius waved him off. "You're looking beautiful as always, Evans." 

"Thanks," Lily replied, running a self-conscious hand through her own Sleekeazy's-filled locks. She'd forgotten the company belonged to James' family. 

"Have fun with old Sluggy," said James, looking between Lily and Sirius with an expression she couldn't decipher. 

"He really is very nice," said Lily, pretending not to notice Sirius rolling his eyes and giving James a pointed look. She chose not to mention it as they walked from the Common Room towards the dungeons where Professor Slughorn's office was located. The older man smiled jovially when they entered the party. 

"Lily, my dear! And Sirius, what a pleasant surprise! I didn't expect to see you here tonight." 

"He's my date this evening, Professor," said Lily. 

"Of course, of course," he smiled. "Well I certainly hope you know that you're always welcome at our little gatherings, Mr. Black. Your brother is around here some place as well." 

"Right," said Sirius. "Well-" 

"Ahh, Jugson my boy!" Professor Slughorn turned away from Lily and Sirius to greet another man who'd just entered the party. "So glad that you could make it. I believe you know Mr. Black already?" 

"Of course, sir," Jugson grinned. "How is the family, Sirius?" 

"Wouldn't know," Sirius glared. 

"And this lovely lady is Lily Evans," the professor continued, seemingly oblivious to the rising tensions between his guests. 

"It's lovely to make your acquaintance. Marcus Jugson," the young man smiled amiably at Lily. "Are you of any relation to Bartemus Evans from Hopping Swallow? We were in the same year at Hogwarts, although he was in Ravenclaw." 

"Oh, no I'm not," Lily flushed. "I'm from Cokeworth." 

"Miss Evans here is a muggleborn," explained Professor Slughorn as if it were the most novel idea he'd ever heard. "Why, she manages to beat out the majority of her classmates in Potions and she'd never even heard of the course until she was eleven! It's quite extraordinary." Lily shifted uncomfortably under Jugson's gaze. As much as she liked Professor Slughorn, she wondered if he'd ever stop thinking of her heritage as a disadvantage to be overcome. 

"That certainly is extraordinary," Jugson agreed, though something in his eyes filled Lily with apprehension. "Do you plan to work for the apothecary after Hogwarts, Miss Evans?" 

"Er, no..." said Lily. "I was actually hoping to do some work with St. Mungo's." Jugson scoffed. 

"It's not just Potions," added Sirius, throwing an arm around her shoulders. "Lily here is near the top of the class in every subject. She's especially adept at Herbology - such a difficult subject, wouldn't you agree, Marcus? Now if you'll excuse us, I see some hor d'oeuvres that are calling my name."  
"What was that about?" Lily asked as soon as they were out of earshot. "Since when do you care about Herbology?" 

"I don't," Sirius shrugged. "But I do care that our buddy Marcus got a Poor on his Herbology O.W.L. Did you see the look on his face when I mentioned it?" 

Lily couldn't do anything but laugh. Sirius seemed so pleased with himself and now that she thought about it, Jugson's expression had been pretty hilarious before she'd been whisked away to the snack table. 

"Y'know, Sirius, I'm glad I brought you to this," she chuckled. 

"In case you've forgotten, Evans, I do know what it's like to have a bunch of negative expectations heaped on you because of who your parents are. You're too good for that shit," he avoided her eyes, turning to pour them both goblets of firewhiskey. 

"Sirius-" 

"No. You're one of the only people around here that doesn't expect me to be an asshole just because the rest of my family is. And you're a hell of a lot smarter than half the people in this room so just accept the compliment and move on." 

Lily beamed as she downed her firewhiskey and led Sirius onto the dance floor. She'd always thought of him as the least mature of the Gryffindor boys, yet she was slowly seeing a new side of her friend over the course of the term. She was glad that he'd accepted her invitation tonight, resolving to spend some more time with him in the future. She had a wonderful time as the night went on, stopping to chat with Gideon, Fabian, Frank, Kiara, Otis, and quite a few other Hogwarts students who were regular attendees of these parties. It was only when she stopped to visit the loo did anyone undesirable visit the pair. 

The grin on Lily's face quickly fell as she left the loo and spotted Sirius standing by the drink table, glaring hatefully at his younger brother. Though she couldn't make out what Regulus was saying from across the room, the two boys' body language made it evident that this was not a loving family reunion. 

"Sirius?" she attempted to step between the two Blacks, rebuffed my her mate. "Want to dance?" 

"Of course," Regulus rolled his eyes. "I should have known you had come with her. Mother and Father ask you to be polite to Professor Slughorn and attend his events, you can't be bothered. The mudblood asks you to attend and you can't do so fast enough." 

"Don't call her that," said Sirius, stepping closer to his brother. 

"Sirius," Lily placed a hand on his arm. "Let's go." 

"Yes, run along," said Regulus. "You've become nothing better than a house elf, trailing after Potter and the others. Will you be shining his shoes later?" Sirius' eyes darkened as he reached for his wand. 

"Hello, Sirius," greeted Marlene McKinnon warmly as she walked up to the group. 

"Hello," he replied shortly, not taking the time to move his eyes off of his brother. 

"Regulus, Professor Slughorn is looking for you," said Marlene as she stepped calmly between the two boys and took a biscuit from the table. "There are some friend of your parents here that he wants you to speak to." 

"Right," Regulus sighed, taking a deep breath as he straightened his posture. "Do you know where they are?" 

"I'll walk you," smiled Marlene, leading him gently away. Lily mouthed "thank you" to the fourth-year Hufflepuff, receiving a wink in return. 

"Sir-" 

"You wanna get out of here?" Sirius asked, roughly grabbing a bottle of firewhiskey from the table. 

"Er, yeah," Lily replied. "That's fine." She glanced worriedly at her mate as they left the dungeons, wandering the corridors until Sirius abruptly stopped at an empty classroom, plopped on top of a desk, and began drinking from the bottle of firewhiskey. 

"My sister hates me," Lily said to break the tense silence, taking a seat on top of another desk. Sirius raised his eyebrow and passed the bottle to her. "We were best mates, back when we were little, when magic was just in fairy tales. Now she hates me." 

"Reg was my best mate too," Sirius nodded. "Before James and the lads of course. Before Hogwarts, before I dared to question the bile my parents have been preaching our whole lives. I don't know if it's better or worse now that Father's dead." 

"I know what you mean," Lily passed took another sip before passing the bottle. "Tuney blames me. Says it's my fault Dad died. If I wasn't so abnormal, she and I wouldn't have spent that Christmas arguing, and he wouldn't have had a heart attack." 

"S'not your fault, Evans." 

"I know that," said Lily. "Most of the time. I just want it to be worth it, you know? Being magical has caused so many problems with my family. I need to at least do something that matters." 

"At least they give a shit what you do," muttered Sirius. "I still worry about him, y'know. Regulus." 

"I think I fancy James," blurted Lily. She didn't even realize what she'd said until she looked up to see Sirius staring at her.  
"Sorry. I, er... I mean, you were sharing secrets... I just, er, you know what, just forget..." 

"Lily." 

"Yes?" she mumbled. 

"You fancy James?" 

"I... yes, okay. Yes. I was so happy when he and Julia broke up, it's honestly embarrassing. Yes, okay? I fancy James. I fancy him quite a bit." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so do you hate me for taking so long to update? Yeah? Me too. I'm terribly sorry BUT please know that I have not / will not abandon this story! It's my baby.
> 
> I do have a question for everyone though. Eventually (not any time soon, don't get too excited) sex is going to be happening and it's going to relevant and matter to the story. I've never written explicit scenes before but if I were to include some within the story, is that something readers would be comfortable with? Or would it be better if I just hint at things without going into any detail? Let me know and please leave any feedback you have!


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